


The Words Left Unsaid

by KittytheSheGeek



Series: Always and Forever [2]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Drama, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Infidelity, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:34:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 33,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27977427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittytheSheGeek/pseuds/KittytheSheGeek
Summary: Eight months after the end of the war, Katara and Zuko are miserable. Try as they might to put their past relationship behind them, neither bender can put the other from their mind, and it only takes one heated night to make everything spiral out of control.This is a direct sequel to my story The Stories In Between: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27120823/chapters/66227155This is a standalone story, but there are references to the previous fic that might make no sense otherwise.
Relationships: Katara/Zuko (Avatar), Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Sokka/Suki (Avatar)
Series: Always and Forever [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2049126
Comments: 5
Kudos: 69





	1. Chapter 1

The first few months after the end of the war flew by so fast, Katara hardly had time to think about anything. Aang had been receiving requests from practically every city and town across the world, and they hardly stayed in one place long enough to catch their breath. But as the days began to grow calmer, the hollow feeling that had consumed her after leaving the Fire Nation Capital started to return. She tried and tried to push it away, but no matter what she did it always crept back up on her. Aang didn’t seem to notice anything was wrong; he was so in love with her and so eager to bask in the praise that he got everywhere he went that he spent each day in a perpetual state of blinding happiness. Katara did the best she could to find her place with him. Over time she found that it wasn’t much different than before, except now in addition to supporting him and praising him and basically caring for his needs like he was a child, she occasionally shared a chaste kiss or held his hand. There was no passion, but it was at least comfortable, and she could work with that. 

Eight months after the end of the war, Aang received a report from King Bumi while they were staying in Omashu that there was unrest in some of the Earth Kingdom colonies. The Fire Nation military presence had left, but many Fire Nation citizens had chosen to remain behind, as they had started families and lives there. It was becoming a problem, mostly because there were still many Earth Kingdom citizens who did not trust anyone who was Fire Nation. The tension needed to be calmed, and the Avatar had been called for. But Aang knew he needed help. 

One morning over breakfast, Aang told Katara about the unrest, and his plans to deal with it. 

“I don’t think I can make a decision on this without talking to Zuko first,” he explained. “So I think we should go to the Capital so I can talk to him directly. This is too delicate an issue to be handled over letters.”

Katara paled, but she couldn’t argue against his point. She agreed that Zuko needed to be in on the conversation too, but the thought of seeing him again made her chest tighten.

“And it would be fun to see him again anyway! It’s been months!” Aang added, not noticing her shift in mood. 

“Maybe I should just stay here and let you two handle it. He’s probably far too busy to spend much time with us anyway…” Katara replied, pushing her food around her plate with her fork. 

“Don’t be silly! He will be happy to see us!” 

Katara frowned down at her plate, but she couldn’t think of a valid lie. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Great! I’ve already sent him a message to let him know we are on the way. I figured we can leave tomorrow, and stay there for a few days.”

“That sounds perfect Aang,” she replied, mustering a smile. 

He grinned at her before digging into his breakfast, completely unaware of the pain behind her smile. Katara put her fork down with a small sigh, and stood. 

“I’m going to get a head start on packing… make sure I don’t forget anything.”

Aang looked up at her with a raised eyebrow. “We have all day! You’re not even done with breakfast.”

“I’m not that hungry,” she lied. “I’d rather just get a head start on it now.”

Aang shrugged and returned to his plate. “Alright then.”

Katara turned to leave the room, then quickly turned back to give him a gentle kiss on the cheek. He beamed at her, and she gave him a weak smile before heading back to her room. That was one benefit of having a chaste and innocent boyfriend; she usually got her own room. Aang always insisted that it wouldn’t be right for them to share, and she had never bothered to argue. 

She crossed to the small desk in her room, pulling a piece of parchment out of the drawer. Zuko had been on her mind constantly for months, and she needed to put an end to it. She wanted closure. She took a deep breath, and began to write. 

_Dear Zuko,_

_I imagine by now you have received Aang’s letter informing you that we are coming to visit; I’m sorry he didn’t think to ask if you even had the time for it first, but you know how he is. He is very eager to see you, and he is optimistic that the two of you can sort out all of this colony business quickly, so if our presence is unwelcome, at least it won’t be for long._

_On that note, I was hoping that maybe we could sit down and talk… if you have time. Or the inclination to do so. I just haven’t seen you in so long, and I...._

_Katara was about to write, I miss you, but she quickly changed her mind. He was just a friend now, and she had to make that clear._

_And I want to know that you are happy and doing well. We have a lot to catch up on. I look forward to seeing you, and I am sorry again if we are intruding. I can only imagine that you have been at least as busy as we have been._

_Anyway, I will see you soon._

_Your friend,_

_Katara_

She read the letter over with a scowl. The whole thing sounded forced and fake, but she wanted to avoid as much awkwardness as possible. To do that, she needed him to know that she was over him… even if it wasn’t true in the slightest. She rolled up the letter and sealed it, resigning that it was good enough, then crept back downstairs to send it before Aang noticed. 

As the day passed by, Katara found herself growing more and more restless. She was both excited to see Zuko again and dreading it, and she was thankful that Aang was busy with Bumi, wanting to spend time with his oldest friend before they left. She was a total mess, and the last thing she needed was Aang pestering her with questions, trying to figure out why. She felt like she had managed to keep her feelings for Zuko well hidden from him, and it would only hurt him if he found out now. Besides, her feelings didn’t matter anymore. Zuko had chosen Mai, and she had chosen Aang. But she couldn’t shake the strange trepidation that grew within her. It was the same feeling she got before a battle; the way the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end and her skin prickled with the threat of impending danger. The same feeling she often got around Zuko. It was terrifying and intoxicating. 

That night she had been unable to sleep, so by the time they had said their goodbyes and left Omashu, she was exhausted. Katara, Aang, and Momo sat quietly in Appa’s saddle, Aang tossing nuts for Momo to catch as Katara dozed sleepily nearby. Aang had been very sweet, not prying into why she was so tired or asking if she was alright. He just brought her some breakfast, and then pulled out a warm blanket for her to cuddle up in as they flew through the chilly morning sky. It was those sort of gestures that touched Katara’s heart and made her believe that she could one day love him the way he deserved, she just needed to tie up the loose ends of her past before she could focus on her future. 

“Hey Katara?” Aang said suddenly, breaking her from her sleepy haze.

She sat up a bit, rubbing her eyes. “Yeah?”

“I just wanted to say… I know I’ve been really busy over the past few months and we really haven’t had the chance to spend a lot of time together… and I’m really sorry for that.”

Katara sat up straighter, giving him a quizzical look. “What brought that on?” 

Aang shrugged. “I’ve just noticed you have been really down a lot lately, and I feel like you have been lonely. I’ve been thinking, and I have an idea that might help.”

“Oh?” 

“Well, after we are done in the Fire Nation, I was thinking maybe we could go to the South Pole… make that our home for now. I would still have to be away a lot, but you wouldn’t have to come with me all the time, you’d be around your family, and when I am not busy I can come stay there too.”

Katara’s chest suddenly felt tight. Here was yet another example of this thoughtfulness, but she couldn’t help the surge of guilt that ran through her. She definitely liked the idea of being around her family though, and the thought of not having to tag along with Aang every time he was summoned was very appealing.

She shuffled closer to him, taking his hand in hers. “I would really like that, Aang. I think that is the perfect solution.”

He beamed at her, then leaned in for a kiss. It was soft and sweet, as they always were, and Katara tried her best to find the heat behind the gesture. But it was to no avail. When they parted she forced a smile to her face, then buried herself back in her blanket as he turned back to Appa’s reigns. Despite everything, knowing that she was soon going home filled her with a happiness she had not felt in months, and soon she managed to drift off to sleep. 

When she awoke, the sun was low in the sky and the Fire Nation palace loomed on the horizon. She tossed the blanket off of her and moved to sit at the front of the saddle, near Aang. He smiled over at her as she settled in, but her eyes were fixed on the grand palace growing larger with every passing moment. The last time she had seen this particular view, she and Zuko had kissed for the last time. The thought made her cheeks feel hot, and she let out a slow breath to steady her emotions. 

They began to descend, and as the ground grew closer Katara could see a small cluster of people waiting below. She swallowed hard, trying to rid herself of the lump in her throat, and before she could prepare herself fully they were landing. Aang leapt off of the saddle, landing on the ground with a soft whoosh of air, and after taking a shaky breath, Katara climbed down after him. 

Her eyes found his immediately, and her heart nearly burst out of her chest. Zuko was staring at her with an intensity that made her knees weak, and she was suddenly grateful that she was still clinging to Appa. She couldn’t make out the intent behind his gaze however, and that scared her more than the sudden rush of heat that moved through her body. 

“Welcome my friends!” Iroh said, coming forward and embracing both Katara and Aang in a tight hug. “It has been far too long. I hope you are both well?” 

“We’re great! It’s so good to be back!” Aang replied, hugging Iroh back with equal fervor. 

Katara couldn’t help but grin at Iroh’s warm greeting. She had always been fond of him, and it was great to see him again. Her nerves calmed somewhat, she looked up and addressed Mai with as warm a smile as she could muster. She didn’t know her well, and in truth, she couldn’t help but be jealous of her. But if she wanted to be friends with Zuko, she had to befriend Mai too.

“It’s lovely to see you again,” she said, summoning as much friendliness as she could spare for the quiet, stoic woman. 

Mai nodded at her, her face unreadable. “It’s lovely to see you too. I hope your journey was pleasant.” 

“It was, thank you.”

The two women locked eyes for a moment, neither of them particularly comfortable with the forced civility, before Aang interrupted. He strode over to Mai and bowed to her in greeting, then asked how she was doing. Katara sidestepped away, happy to escape the awkwardness between her and Mai, only to find herself swept up into Zuko’s arms. Her breath caught in her throat as she was enveloped in his warm embrace, and while it was brief, she swore she could feel his hands linger on her waist for just a few moments too long before he let her go. She chanced a glance at him, finding his golden eyes already fixed on her. 

“It’s good to see you,” he said, his voice low. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too,” Katara replied automatically, releasing the breath she had been holding.

She knew immediately she was in trouble. Katara took a step away from him, desperate to get away from his intoxicating presence. He smelled just as good as she had remembered; a mix of spices mingled with a slight burnt smell, like the scent of burning parchment. It made her head swim, and she knew she needed to get away. 

He said nothing else, but Katara could feel his eyes on her. She took a couple of steps back, needing to put distance between them. Thankfully she was saved by Iroh.

“Why don’t you two settle in and freshen up, and we will meet in the dining room for dinner?” he said, gesturing two servants forward. “Please show Master Katara and Avatar Aang to their rooms,” he added to the servants, giving them a pleasant smile.

The servants bowed in reply, and Katara immediately took the chance to get as far away from Zuko as possible. She thanked Iroh, then she and Aang followed the servants upstairs to their rooms. The moment she was alone, she dropped her bag and fell face-first onto the bed, letting out a frustrated scream that she muffled in the pillows. After a few moments she composed herself and sat up, the momentary release helping her frustration some. It was then that she noticed the flowers on her nightstand. 

They were a vase full of beautiful, pale blue lilies that faded to white at the tips of the petals. She had never seen this sort of flower before, but with the gradual fade to white and the gentle curve of the petals, they reminded her of the crest of an ocean wave. She stood and moved closer, spotting a small, sealed note leaning against the vase. Curious, she picked it up and turned it over. The seal was definitely Fire Nation, but it wasn’t the usual three pronged flame; it was the five-pointed flame of the Fire Lord. _Zuko’s_ seal. She took a deep breath, then broke the seal on the note and unfolded it. She immediately recognized his messy, loopy script, and smiled despite herself. The note only had three words: 

_The pond. Midnight._

She felt her heart leap into her throat. Everything about this, the flowers, the note, meeting so late at night, it all felt like a series of bad ideas leading to a giant mistake. Yet she couldn’t help the rush of anticipation that coursed through her veins.

Suddenly there was a knock at her door and she jumped, stuffing the letter under her tunic and into her bindings before calling for her guest to enter. Aang popped his head in and grinned at her.

“All settled in?” he asked.

“Yup!” she replied, her voice high. “Shall we go down?” 

She crossed the room and headed down the hall with Aang, grateful that he couldn’t hear her pounding heart. 

XXXX

Dinner had been a welcome reprieve from the swirling emotions Katara had been battling within herself. She, Aang, Zuko, Mai, and Iroh all sat down to a private dinner, spending the evening catching up and swapping post-war stories. Thankfully Katara’s nerves had seemed to calm down, and while she still had a hard time looking at Zuko without her heart skipping a beat, she was finding it easier and easier to latch onto the familiarity of their friendship. It was reassuring how quickly she was able to slip into a comfortable conversation with him, and it gave her hope.

“So how is Sokka?” Zuko asked, turning to Katara.

“Oh, he’s fine. He’s missing Suki, but they seem to be making the long distance thing work for now,” she replied, fixing her eyes on her food. “He’s going to Kyoshi Island soon to visit her.”

“What about the rest of your family? Are they all well?” 

Katara glanced at him briefly, appreciating his inquiries after her family. “They’re all fine. Dad has been busy with the restoration of the South and last I heard it was going very well. Gran Gran and Pakku have settled down in the South now, and Pakku is training new Waterbenders. Apparently I wasn’t the last one after all, but all the benders they found are quite young and untrained so they are lucky to have a Master training them.”

“I’m really glad to hear that. It’s good to know that the South is starting to flourish,” Zuko replied. 

“We’re actually heading back there after we leave,” Aang piped up. “We’re going to live there for a while.”

Zuko raised an eyebrow at him. “Is that so?”

“Yeah, I feel bad for dragging Katara around with me everywhere, so this way she can stay with her family when she doesn’t want to come with me.”

Katara swore she could see the corner of Zuko’s mouth turn up in a slight smirk, but it was gone as fast as it had appeared. She wondered what had brought it on; the idea that she was returning home, or Aang’s unintended inclination that they weren’t going to spend much time together as a couple.

“Mai, have you heard from Ty Lee lately?” Katara asked, trying to change the subject. “Suki sent me a letter and said she is doing well with the Kyoshi Warriors, but I haven’t heard much else.”

“We actually write to each other a lot. She’s very happy there and is making lots of friends, but that’s no surprise. She makes friends easily,” Mai replied, a flicker of sadness crossing her usually stoic face. 

“You must miss her a lot,” Katara said, picking up on the momentary crack in her emotions. 

Mai shrugged. “She’s happy, and that’s what matters.”

“Has anyone heard much from Toph since the end of the war? “Aang asked curiously. 

“Oh she and I exchange frequent letters,” Iroh replied. 

Katara and Aang both gave him a surprised look, and he chuckled. 

“How does she send letters?” Aang asked.

“She has someone read them to her, and when she wants to reply she dictates her words and has someone write for her. She went back home for a while to try and reconcile with her parents, so she had plenty of servants around who could help her. But she has been travelling recently so it has been more difficult for her.”

“It would be nice if we could get everyone together soon,” Zuko said. “It’s hard keeping up with everyone through letters.”

“I know what you mean. It’s especially hard when we are always on the move,” Aang agreed. “Sometimes I miss how things were before the end of the war. Not that I miss the war… I just miss spending every day with everyone.” 

Zuko nodded. “I miss it too,” he replied, glancing briefly at Katara. She blushed slightly, taking a quick drink from her glass to cover it. 

“Well I spent the last few weeks of the war in a dirty prison cell, so I’ll pass on the joyful reminiscing,” Mai interjected, narrowing her eyes suspiciously at Zuko. 

“Yes, let’s not talk about the war; it is a tiresome topic,” Iroh agreed. Patting Mai’s arm sympathetically. 

The rest of the evening passed mostly with chatter about how well the three nations were recovering and changing over the past few months, and by the time they all wandered up to bed the moon was already high in the sky. Katara returned to her room after saying goodnight to everyone, closing the door tightly behind her before letting out a slow breath. She dug Zuko’s note out of her bindings and re-read the short message, contemplating whether or not it was a good idea to go. One one hand, it would be a good opportunity to clear the air with him, as she had originally intended. She wanted to put whatever relationship they had once shared behind them once and for all, and agree to move forward as friends. On the other hand… she wasn’t sure she could trust herself around him. She could barely even look at him without the overwhelming need to press her lips to his. 

She crossed the room, scooping up her discarded bag and moving it over to her bed. She stared at the note in her hand for another moment, then untied her bag and gently tucked it among her things. She wanted to keep the flowers too, but those would be far less easy to carry around, not to mention not at all discreet. She made up her mind. She would go, and she would extinguish the fire between them once and for all.

XXXX

Zuko had been in absolute hell. From the moment Katara had arrived, he had barely been able to keep his eyes off her, and he knew that both Mai and Iroh had noticed. He felt awful, but every time he let his mind wander, he snapped back to reality with his eyes fixed back on her face. Even her scent was intoxicating; a mix of ocean salt and flowers that was so uniquely her. It was a scent he hadn’t even realized he had missed so badly until he had embraced her. 

He had thought he had done a fairly decent job of letting her go over the passing months, but he was starting to realize that he had merely been distracted by his new role. His feelings for her hadn’t waned in the slightest, he had merely buried them under his work. It didn’t help that things didn’t feel right between him and Mai. He felt so out of step with her, and while the first few weeks had been fine, they eventually settled into a comfortable indifference when it came to their romantic relationship. She spent most of her time writing letters to Ty Lee, taking tea with Iroh, or throwing her knives around, and he spent his time diving head first into being the Fire Lord. They ate their meals together, and shared a gentle goodnight kiss before parting every evening, but otherwise they barely even spoke. There was no resentment between them, and he still considered her a friend, but what little spark there was between them was snuffed out long before either of them could remember. But at least their relationship was comfortable, and it kept the nobles of the Fire Nation from throwing their daughters at him every time he made a public appearance. 

When he had received Katara’s letter he had felt an unexpected surge of anticipation. He had never gotten the chance to talk to her before they went their separate ways, and despite his determination to let her go, he couldn't help clinging to a little shred of hope that she still wanted him too. He was ready and willing to fight for her, but he didn’t want to destroy their friendship by pushing too far unless he heard it from her mouth. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he never knew for sure. 

He knew getting her alone wouldn’t be easy. She had spent their last couple of weeks together avoiding him entirely, though she seemed eager to talk now. But with a palace full of people lurking about, not to mention the presence of Aang and Mai, he knew he wouldn’t be able to just pull her aside for such a serious and private talk. He wasn’t sure how much Aang knew, but he had never once mentioned his relationship with Katara to Mai. He had a feeling she suspected something had happened between them, but she never pried, so he never offered the story. 

The day Katara and Aang were scheduled to arrive, Zuko had snuck into Katara’s room after the servants were finished preparing it. He had gone down to the market early in the morning to pick out some flowers, finding some beautiful, pale blue lilies that reminded him of waves. Of her. He had put them in a vase on her bedside table, leaving a small, sealed note for her to find, praying to any spirit who would listen that she would actually read it instead of tossing it on the fire. 

The people of the Fire Nation tended to be early risers, like most Firebenders, so he knew that the palace would be dead after midnight. Apart from whichever guards were on duty, most of the staff would be fast asleep by then. He had chosen the pond mostly because he knew she was familiar with its location; he had noted that she had spent a lot of time there during her last stay at the palace, and it was a spot that meant a lot to him. Plus if anyone did happen to walk by, it would be far less suspicious spotting two old friends chatting in the garden than if they had been discovered hidden away in a room alone together. His plans were set, and he was feeling confident as he met up with Iroh and Mai to watch for the looming figure of Appa. 

Unfortunately his confidence seemed to melt away the second he spotted Katara. She was even more radiant than he remembered, and the second her eyes met his he felt whole, like a piece of his soul had been missing for months and it was her presence that filled the emptiness. All at once the feelings he had been trying to lock away burst forth, and it took every ounce of his willpower not to kiss her. Even still, he couldn’t help sweeping her into his embrace. 

Much to his relief, she had been a lot more receptive and friendly with him over the course of the evening than she had been the last time they saw each other. It had bolstered his confidence back up, and he was feeling hopeful. He wished with all his heart that their conversation would end with them getting back together, but at the very least he felt sure they could work out the tension between them and be friends. Not having Katara in his life was utter torture, and if friendship was all he could have, then he would take it. 

He wandered down to the garden early to wait, pacing anxiously and perking up at every noise, disappointed every time it wasn’t her. He let out a nervous breath and looked up; the moon was cresting high in the sky. He was filled with sudden dread that she had chosen not to come. But just as he had begun cursing himself for being stupid enough to leave her flowers and notes, he saw a silhouette approaching him. He smiled, recognizing the way she moved without even seeing her face. He placed one hand on the truck of the tree next to him to prevent himself from sweeping her into his arms, and whispered her name into the darkness. 

XXXX

Katara had found the garden easily enough. She had traced the same path dozens of times the last time she was in the Fire Nation, and she was grateful that Zuko had chosen a place she was familiar with. The last thing she wanted was to get lost in the palace on her way to a secret rendezvous with the Fire Lord. She pushed open the doors to the garden and crept out into the darkness, the moon her only source of light. She followed the path until she saw the large tree next to the small pond, and standing underneath, the familiar figure of Zuko. He spotted her, whispering her name almost reverently, and she felt her heart leap. She twisted her fingers through the ends of her hair as she approached him, feeling unbearably nervous. 

“Hi Zuko,” she said, grimacing slightly at such a weak greeting. 

“I’m glad you came,” he replied, his golden eyes fixed on her with a burning intensity. She could almost feel the heat coming off of him, and it made her blush. 

“Um… T-thank you for the flowers,” she stammered, unsure of what else to say. 

He smiled and looked relieved. “I’m glad you like them.” 

They stood in awkward silence for a moment, then Zuko cleared his throat and sat down, patting the grass next to him. Hesitantly she moved forward and sat down next to him, and with only a few inches between them, she really could feel the heat radiating off of him. It was intoxicating. 

“So I…. uh… I wanted to… er… how have you been?” she asked, turning her face away to hide the pained look that crossed her face at her own inability to speak.

“Well, you know. Busy,” he replied vaguely. 

“Well I assumed that much, _Fire Lord_ ,” she teased. 

He flinched at his title and frowned at her. “Please don’t call me that. I hear it all day long and I’m still not used to it. I really don’t want to hear it from my friends… especially not you.”

“Zuko, I’m only teasing you,” she replied regretfully. 

“I know, I just…” he sighed. “There’s a big enough distance between us already without you addressing me so formally.”

Katara let out a breath and drew her knees up to her chest. It was a slight comfort to know that he felt the distance between them too, and that he seemed to hate it as much as she did. But she didn’t know how to even begin to fix it. 

Zuko watched her for a moment, then let out another sigh, leaning back against the tree. “To be perfectly honest Katara, I have been miserable. I’ve missed you so much that it _hurts_ , and the only thing keeping me from breaking down is the fact that I have been so busy. It’s given me something to focus on other than how empty I feel without you.” 

Katara was shocked by his honesty, and looked to him with wide eyes. She had not expected him to be so candid, and it threw her. She swallowed hard, desperately searching for something to say in reply. 

“I still love you, Katara. I never stopped,” he added softly. 

This wasn’t at all how she had been expecting the conversation to go. He had _chosen_ to be with Mai, so how could he sit there lamenting about how much he missed her? His confession elated her, but with that elation, the rending pain of her broken heart that she had pushed down and locked away began to seep through. She couldn’t help but think of the moment she had seen him kissing Mai, and how utterly broken it had left her. 

She knew it was largely her own fault for not sorting things out between them sooner, but he had also chosen to move on without her. It wasn’t fair for him to take it back now that she was finally feeling strong enough to at least repair their friendship. She felt like she had been trying to crawl her way out of a pit, and she had just reached the surface when the ground broke under her feet, sending her cascading back down into the darkness. 

Her heart was pounding, and the flurry of emotions within her threatened to break free. She got to her feet with a gasping breath, fighting to keep herself together. Zuko stood as well, watching her with a confused expression. 

“Katara…” he started. 

“No… Zuko don’t,” she said, cutting him off. 

“Don’t what?” 

“Don’t… don’t break my heart more than you already have,” she said, letting out a sob against her will. 

His face fell, and she could tell that her words had wounded him. She regretted it instantly. 

“Always and forever, remember? I told you before our fight with Azula that I would always love you. I’m not trying to break your heart… I’m…” 

“You’re _what_ , Zuko?” she pressed, more harshly than she had intended. 

His face hardened, and she could tell he was annoyed. “I’m just trying to be honest with you, Katara.”

She wasn’t sure why his words made her angry. Maybe she was angry at herself, or maybe anger was the one emotion that she could make sense of in that moment, but it bubbled up and took control. 

“There is no _always and forever_ , Zuko! That ended the moment you chose Mai, and I chose Aang,” she hissed at him. 

He narrowed his eyes, her anger provoking his own. “You don’t even love Aang! You chose him because it would be easier, not because you wanted to!” 

“How would you know?” she yelled. “You haven’t spoken to me in eight months!” 

“Because I know you, Katara! I know what you do when you get scared and feel vulnerable!” 

She scoffed, knowing he was right but refusing to admit it. “It doesn’t matter anyway; we’ve already made our choices. It’s too late.” 

“It’s not too late, Katara. You’re no more obligated to stay with Aang than I am to stay with Mai. I _want_ to be with _you_.”

“It is too late,” she argued stubbornly. 

“Why? Have you stopped loving me? Are you over us?” 

“I… that’s irrelevant.”

“How is that irrelevant, Katara?” Zuko yelled, throwing his arms up in frustration. “It’s pretty damn simple; you either love me, or you don’t. Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me, and I will drop it forever.” 

Her eyes immediately fell to her feet, and she shuffled uncomfortably. “I… I don’t,” she said unconvincingly. 

Zuko crossed his arms and let out an annoyed sigh. “You never were a good liar.” 

Her anger was the only thing keeping her from breaking down into a sobbing mess, and she clung to it like a piece of driftwood in the raging sea. 

“I’m going back to my room. Please leave me alone,” she said curtly, turning on her heel and marching towards the garden doors. 

“Katara, don’t just walk away from this!” Zuko called, rushing after her. 

She could feel the tears threatening to escape, and she walked faster, making her way through the doors and across the foyer. Zuko caught up to her on the stairs.

“ _Katara_ , come back and talk to me!” 

“I have nothing to say to you, Zuko!” she called back, picking up her pace to a jog.

She heard him let out a frustrated growl behind her, and guilt started to creep through her anger. She let out a despairing sob as her tears finally burst forth. She wanted nothing more than to turn around and run into his arms instead, but she had barely survived having her heart broken by him the last time… she wouldn’t survive it again. 

Katara ran the rest of the way to her room, bursting through the door and flinging it closed, but Zuko was faster. He pushed the door back open before it was fully closed and slipped into the room, closing it firmly behind him. He stood blocking the door, chest heaving. 

Tears streamed down her face and her heart threatened to burst out of her chest, but she had nowhere else to flee to. She gave him a pleading look.

“Zuko... “ she choked. “We missed our chance. It doesn’t matter how we feel… it’s over. It has to be.” 

“I don’t believe that,” he whispered. 

She let out a heavy sigh. “What do you want from me?” 

“I want you to tell me the truth!” 

“I already have!”

“No, all you’ve given me are excuses, Katara. You at least owe me honesty.”

She let out a frustrated cry, wiping furiously at her tears. The truth was obvious to both of them; she still loved him, but she was too afraid of getting hurt again. He saw right through her as he always did, but she wouldn’t say it out loud. 

He walked forward suddenly, his expression softer. He reached out and gently placed his hand on her cheek, wiping away her tears with his thumb. She looked up at him, releasing a shaking breath and leaned into his touch automatically. She could feel a magnetic pull between them, making her dizzy. She reached up and placed her hands on his chest to steady herself, her eyes fixed on his. 

Katara wasn’t sure who moved first; she only knew that the moment their lips touched, she felt whole again. It felt so familiar, so right. In his embrace she found all the passion and the fire she had been missing over the past eight months with Aang, and she couldn’t help but succumb to it. 

Her hands moved up his chest and into his hair, her finders winding into his dark locks. She felt his arms tighten around her, pulling her close, and she instantly moved into him. Everything felt so natural. Even after so many months, they still knew each other’s bodies well. Without thinking, she pulled him back towards her bed. He followed automatically, lost in her kiss. She moaned against him, and it drove him wild. They tumbled onto the mattress and Katara wrapped her legs around his hips as Zuko broke away from her mouth to leave a trail of kisses down her neck, gently biting at the flesh on her collarbone and enticing another moan. 

She pulled at his shirt eagerly, wanting to feel more of his skin on her bare hands. He broke away from her long enough to pull it off and toss it on the floor before returning to her mouth, kissing her deeply. He ran his hands up her sides, causing her to arch her back and grind her hips into his. He moaned against her, moving one hand to her lower back, pulling her tunic open with the other. Their hands explored, feeling every curve of each other’s bodies, gasping with hot desire. 

Katara wanted him, _all_ of him, but as his hands roamed over her chest and down towards the hem of her pants, she felt a sudden pang of guilt. It washed over her, clearing her mind just long enough to realize that they were making a huge mistake. She reached down and gently grasped Zuko’s wrists, breaking their kiss. She took a few shaky breaths, trying to catch her breath as Zuko sat up slightly to give her space. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, breathing hard. 

She nodded. “I just… don’t think we should continue this. We’ve already gone too far.”

He looked at her sadly, but nodded. “You’re right. We can’t do this to Aang and Mai.” 

He pulled away from her, running his hands through his hair as he took a long, calming breath. Katara sat up and wrapped her tunic back around herself, feeling ashamed and confused. Zuko let out a small breath and moved to get off the bed, but Katara reached out and grabbed his arm, not ready to let him go just yet. 

“Will you… will you stay with me? Just for tonight?” 

He gave her another sad look and was silent for a moment, but then he nodded. “Always,” he whispered. 

She gave him a sorrowful smile, suddenly remembering their last few days together. They had both known their relationship was over, but neither of them had been ready to let go then either. Zuko extinguished the torches with a wave of his hand, and together they crawled under the blankets. He reached out his arms for her, and she snuggled against him, draping her arm around his waist as his arms encircled her frame. She had missed this most of all. She was usually restless at night, especially around the full moon, but in Zuko’s arms she always slept so soundly. 

She started fading fast, and the last thing she remembered before sleep took her was Zuko gently running his hands through her hair, and whispering, “I love you.” She wanted to say it too, but the only reply she could muster was a sad sigh before she drifted into darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

Katara awoke late the next morning, feeling more rested than she had in ages. But as she woke, she was met with a profound heaviness. They had resolved nothing… in fact they had made it all worse. She felt so guilty, and it twisted her stomach into knots. Yet, she couldn’t shake the little spark of happiness she felt waking up in Zuko’s arms. 

As she opened her eyes, she realized that he was already awake, and had been laying silently, watching her sleep with a sorrowful, longing gaze. She could tell by the look on his face that he had been awake for a while, and there was something on his mind. She shifted and propped herself up on one elbow, giving him a curious look. 

“I don’t want to lose you, Katara,” he whispered. 

She frowned, reaching up to brush his hair away from his face. “What happened last night… it can’t happen again. We _have_ to put this all behind us and move on, before we hurt each other more, _and_ hurt Aang and Mai in the process.” 

He looked away from her and closed his eyes, lost in his thoughts. She rested her hand against his cheek, letting her fingers graze his scar. He leaned into her touch, and she found herself wondering if he ever let Mai touch him this way. 

“You don’t have to lose me, Zuko,” she said softly. “We just… have to accept that all we can have is friendship. We made our choices, and now we have to live with them. Let last night be our last goodbye.” 

Zuko sighed and opened his eyes to look at her. “You know that I will never stop loving you, even if we can only be friends,” he said. 

Katara smiled sadly. “I know.”

Before either of them could say another word, there was a knock at the door. 

“Katara, are you awake?” came Aang’s voice.

Katara looked to Zuko with wide eyes, and he cursed under his breath. He bolted out of the bed and collected his crumpled tunic from the floor, pulling it on hurriedly. 

“Just a second!” Katara called, leaping out of the bed and adjusting her own clothes. 

Zuko scowled as he looked around the room for an escape, his eyes landing on the balcony. He moved towards it, but Katara grabbed his arm.

“Zuko, no! You can’t jump off the balcony, you’ll get hurt!” she whispered insistently.

He smirked at her. “Come on Katara, you know me better than that; I’ll be fine. Besides, I’d rather jump off the balcony myself than have Aang blast me off of it.”

She giggled despite herself. “Fine, but be careful.”

“I’ll be fine,” he insisted, hushing her. “I’ll see you later.” 

“See you,” she whispered back, watching him disappear over the balcony railing. 

She peered over the side and saw him crouched below, looking around cautiously before taking off towards the nearest entrance. She sighed, then crossed the room and opened the door. Aang was standing before her, holding a tray with two plates and a steaming teapot. 

“Good morning Katara!” he said, beaming. “You slept in, so I thought I’d bring you up some food and we could have breakfast together.” 

She felt a ripple of guilt tear through her, but pushed it down and forced a smile. “Thank you Aang, that’s very thoughtful,” she said, stepping aside to let him in.

He strolled past her and crossed to a small table in the corner of the room, setting the tray down. He pulled out a chair for her, gesturing for her to sit. She let out a small sigh, and took a seat, allowing him to push the chair in for her. He sat opposite her and handed her one of the plates before pouring the tea. 

“What time is your meeting today?” Katara asked, pushing her food around on her plate. 

“I’m supposed to meet Zuko and Iroh at noon, then we’re going to meet with Zuko’s Council and the Earth Kingdom ambassador afterwards. Hopefully it should all be resolved by dinner,” he replied. 

Katara nodded, staring down at her plate anxiously. “I was thinking… if all your meetings go well today, we should leave tonight. If that’s okay.”

Aang frowned at her. “Is everything okay? I thought you’d want to stay for a few days and spend some time with Zuko.”

Spending time with Zuko was exactly what she was trying to avoid. She was determined to make their friendship work, but she didn’t trust herself around him yet, and she didn’t want another repeat of the previous night. 

“I’m just eager to see my family,” she answered. It wasn’t a lie, but it was far from the whole truth. 

Aang nodded sagely, and reached out to pat her hand. “I understand. I’ll try and get everything wrapped up this afternoon, and if it all goes well, we can leave after dinner.”

“Thank you Aang, I appreciate it.”

He beamed at her, then dug into his breakfast, not even noticing that she had hardly touched hers. It amazed her how he could be so thoughtful while still being completely oblivious to how she was truly feeling. Zuko always seemed to know her thoughts better than she did, and while it was annoying that he was always able to read her like a book, it was also nice to have someone anticipate her needs. 

She set her fork down with a quiet sigh. She had to stop thinking like that. She had to shut down her feelings for Zuko for good, and focus on repairing their friendship, otherwise she would lose him entirely. 

After breakfast, Aang took off to prepare for his meeting. Katara bathed and changed, then spent some time making sure all her things were packed. Once she ran out of things to do she ventured out of her room, intending on exploring the palace a little more. But she hadn’t gotten far when she was stopped by a servant, who bowed respectfully as she approached. 

“Master Katara, I am sorry to bother you, but I have a message from Lady Mai,” she said. 

“From Mai?” Katara questioned, raising an eyebrow. “What is it?” 

“Lady Mai has requested your company for tea. If you are free, I can lead you to her room now.”

“Er… sure. Lead the way,” Katara replied, confused as to why Mai had any interest in spending time with her. 

The servant turned and led Katara through the halls, eventually stopping at a heavy wooden door. She knocked, and Katara heard Mai’s voice from within. The servant opened the door and bowed to Mai. 

“Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, my lady,” she said. 

“Send her in,” came Mai’s reply. 

The servant stepped out of the doorway and gestured for Katara to enter, bowing as she passed. Once she was through the threshold, the servant bowed once more and closed the door, leaving Katara alone. 

Mai sat on a cushion at a small table, a steaming pot of tea already set before her. Her room was dark and scarcely decorated, but Katara did note several sharp blades littering the walls. She gulped, and moved into the room to sit down across from Mai.

“Thank you for joining me,” she said in her usual monotone way. 

“Er… thank you for inviting me,” Katara replied, eyeing her cautiously. 

“I trust your visit has been enjoyable?” 

Katara gave her a questioning look, suddenly suspicious that Mai knew more about her visit than she should. “Yes, it’s been lovely so far,” she replied, on guard. 

Mai reached forward and picked up the teapot, pouring two cups of tea before setting the pot down again. She placed one cup in front of Katara, picking up the other and holding it between her palms. Katara stared down at the tea, then looked back up to Mai suspiciously, trying to figure out what she was up to. 

“I didn’t poison it, you know,” Mai said suddenly, taking a sip from her cup without looking up at her. 

Katara blushed and picked up her cup, taking a sip. “I’m sorry, uh… I’m just not sure why you asked me here,” she confessed. 

Mai set her cup down and turned her dark eyes to Katara. “Since Aang and Zuko are busy all afternoon, I thought it would be a good opportunity to talk,” she replied. 

“Oh… I see..” 

“You are important to Zuko, so I figured I would get to know you better.” 

Katara blushed, taking another sip of her tea to hide it. She glanced up at Mai, whose eyes were fixed on her, and wondered just how much she knew. 

“Well, what would you like to know?” Katara asked.

“I know you have a brother, and I met your father briefly at the coronation. But I don’t know much about your family. Do you have other siblings?” 

“No, just Sokka.”

“Do you have other relatives?” 

“Well, my Gran Gran, and now Master Pakku of the Northern Water Tribe. He and my Gran Gran got married shortly before the end of the war,” Katara replied. 

“And your mother died when you were young, yes?” 

Katara frowned at her blunt question. “Yes, she was killed in a Fire Nation raid,” she said coldly.”

Mai nodded and took another sip of her tea, studying Katara carefully. She seemed to get the hind that her mother was a sensitive topic however, and moved on. 

“Your father is the… Chieftain is it?” she asked. 

“Yes. He is the leader of the Southern Water Tribe.” 

“And your brother will inherit that title one day?” 

“Er… most likely yes.”

“Most likely?” 

“Well it works a bit differently in the South. If the heir of the current Chieftain is unfit or unwilling to lead, a new leader will be elected. And our leaders don’t… _rule_. Not the way they do here. They lead us, yes, but we are more collaborative. Everyone in the South has a voice and their voice is respected.” 

“So do you and your brother have any additional responsibilities or expectations as the children of the current… Chieftain?” 

“Sure, I suppose. But until the end of the war it didn’t matter, because our village had only a few dozen people. We had no choice.” 

Mai studied her for a moment before speaking again. “So would you consider yourself to have the same status as say, a princess?” 

Katara raised an eyebrow at her, confused by her line of questioning. “Not really, no. Like I said, the Southern Water Tribe works differently. But I suppose that would be the closest equivalent if a comparison was necessary.” 

“Hm. I see,” Mai replied, nodding curtly. 

“Why do you ask? When you said you wanted to get to know me, I figured you would ask me my favourite colour or something.”

Mai scoffed. “That’s trivial and boring information that has no relevance whatsoever. As I’m sure you would imagine, I know nothing about Water Tribe social structure and politics, so it is beneficial to me to learn.”

“I suppose, but learning about the Water Tribe only tells you a small part of who I am as a person. I am very much a part of my culture, but my culture does not define me.”

Mai cracked a small smile. “Fair point.Then tell me, what is your favourite colour?” she asked, amused. 

“Gold,” Katara replied automatically. 

Mai raised an eyebrow at her. “An interesting choice. I can’t imagine the colour appears frequently on the frozen tundra of the South Pole.”

“You’ve never seen the first rays of sunlight as it breaks across the snowy horizon,” she replied. She wasn’t lying; she did love the colour. She did, however, leave out that the gorgeous tundra sunrises happened to be the same colour as Zuko’s eyes. 

“It’s strange,” Mai said, taking a sip of her tea. “Zuko’s favourite colour is blue. I suppose you both enjoy colours that are rare to your respective nations.” 

Katara blushed, once again suspecting that Mai knew more than she was letting on. She drank more of her tea, trying to hide her discomfort as they settled into an awkward silence. Mai watched her intently, her face expressionless and impossible to read. 

“Do you think you would ever visit the Water Tribes?” Katara asked, trying to change the subject. 

Mai shrugged. “If I had a reason to be there. I’m not really interested in travelling for the sake of travelling.”

“I love to travel,” Katara replied. “I have so many great memories from travelling with Aang before the war.”

“Do you not have good memories now that the war is over?” 

“Er… that’s not… that’s not what I meant,” Katara said, catching herself. 

“Aren’t you going back home after you leave? Why are you returning home if you love to travel?”

“Well… I.... I miss my family and my home. I still love travelling, but it’s not the same now. For one, it’s usually just Aang and I. And I usually end up sitting around doing nothing while he is doing Avatar things.”

“Much like today, I suppose.” 

“Er… yeah.”

“I can see why going home would be preferable then.” 

“Suki visits often too, to see Sokka, so it will be great to spend time with her again. I haven’t seen her since we all left Ba Sing Se,” Katara said. “She’s basically like a sister to me, and I miss her a lot.” 

Mai nodded. “Ty Lee speaks very highly of Suki.” she sipped slowly on her tea, eyes fixed on Katara. “I’ve fought against her, and I will give credit when due; she is a formidable opponent. She held her own quite well against Azula too, that that is no easy feat.”

Katara got the impression that Mai was trying to unsettle her, but she had plenty of her own friends who were once enemies. Mai, Azula, and Ty Lee were the reason Suki ended up in prison, but Suki had certainly gotten over it. Katara had no reason to hold onto a grudge that she had nothing to do with. 

“I imagine she is even more formidable now that Ty Lee has taught the Kyoshi Warriors Chi Blocking,” Katara replied, giving her a sly smirk. 

“Yes, I suppose so.”

“You should visit Ty Lee sometime. I’m sure she would love to see you,” Katara said.

“I would only be a distraction,” Mai said, a hint of sadness in her tone, surprising Katara. 

“You two are quite close, aren’t you?” Katara asked.

“She’s my closest friend,” Mai confirmed. 

“Then I’m sure she would welcome the distraction,” Katara replied with a smile.

Mai let out a low sigh, her stony exterior cracking slightly. “It’s not that simple.”

“It never is, is it?” Katara replied with a frown, beginning to suspect there may have been two broken hearts in the room. 

Mai set down her cup, looking slightly annoyed by the turn in the conversation. “Thank you for joining me for tea. We should do it again soon,’ she said.

Katara got the hint, and was grateful to be released from the awkwardness of their conversation. “Yes, definitely,” she replied, with no intention of following through.

They both stood and Mai walked her to the door, opening it. Katara smiled and nodded her head, then slipped out into the hallway and made her escape. She wandered aimlessly, her mind swimming with questions. What exactly did Mai know about her and Zuko? It seemed that she at least suspected there had been something between them before the end of the war, but she didn’t understand why Mai had been questioning her about lineage and succession. It was all very strange. And then there was Ty Lee… Katara couldn’t help but wonder if Mai and the boisterous chi blocker were in a similar situation as her and Zuko. But then why was Mai with Zuko? None of it made sense. 

Frustrated, she headed out into the courtyard. She needed to let off some steam, and in order to do that she would need access to water, and plenty of space. She knew well that the courtyard had both. Thankfully there weren’t many people around. Apart from her, Aang, Iroh, and the Earth Kingdom ambassador, there weren’t any visitors that she was aware of, and she had noticed that the palace was much quieter in general than it had been the last time she had been there. With just a few guests, the permanent residents, and the palace staff, the place seemed almost as empty as it had the night they defeated Azula. It was almost homey. 

Katara walked into the center of the courtyard, taking a few deep, meditative breaths. She stood with her feet apart, knees slightly bent, and closed her eyes as she reached out with her chi. Immediately she could sense the water around her; the long troughs that ran the length of the courtyard, the water running under the grates of the pavilions, even the water that hung in the humid afternoon air. It called to her, and she smiled. 

Without opening her eyes, she pulled the water to her, feeling it swirl around her like a cool embrace. For a few moments she just moved the water in a stream around her, limbering up her body. Everything in her life since she had found Aang in that iceberg had been total, unpredictable chaos, but the one time she ever felt truly stable was when she was bending. She relished the feeling. Seeing Zuko again, their fight, their passionate, longing kisses… it was all outside of her control. Her emotions were in a flurry and she couldn’t grasp onto any of them long enough to sort them out. But now, standing under the hot sun, surrounded by her element she felt centered and calm. She felt powerful and dangerous. Most of all, she felt in control. 

She opened her eyes, forming the water into two tentacles around her arms. She lashed out, the tendrils moving at her will, dancing in circles around the courtyard as she struck out at invisible foes. Suddenly she pushed the water ahead of her and it froze. She leapt up onto the sheet of ice, skating forward and moving the slick track ahead of her as she circled the courtyard again. She recalled doing the same technique during her fight with Azula, and the memory of dodging lightning strikes and hot, blue flame made her heart race with exhilaration. The memory sparked her aggression, and she jumped from her ice track, landing in a graceful crouch before forming the water into a wall before her. With a flick of her wrists the wall of water turned into a wall of sharp icicles. She pushed her arms forward and the icicles obeyed, flying forward. She heard the sound of repetitive impact as the icicles struck the pavilion, sticking into the roof, the pillars, and the ground before her. 

Katara stood, panting slightly as she inspected the damage of her attack. She had meant to melt the icicles into water before they struck, but her aggression had gotten the better of her. She melted the ice, gently bending the water back into the troughs, wondering how she would explain to Zuko that one side of the courtyard now looked like a used pincushion. She had to admit though, she felt a lot better. 

She turned to head back into the palace and froze. A small crowd had formed on the stairs behind her, and they were watching with mixed looks of fear and awe. Katara felt her cheeks burn; even a few of the guards had stopped to watch. 

“Er… hi,” she said awkwardly. “Um… excuse me.”

She moved forward, the group parting for her as she approached, and hurried back into the palace. 

XXXX

Zuko was exhausted. Between staying up way too late only to wake at dawn as usual and the full day of meetings, not to mention all the emotional exhaustion of the last 24 hours, he felt ready to drop. The meetings had gone surprisingly well, and it seemed that they had a resolution at hand. The Fire Nation was to officially open its borders and invite members of the other nations to settle, if they wished. They expected some of the mixed families in the Earth Kingdom to make the move, and hoped that having more blended borders would ease some of the tension between the Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom. There were other plans in motion, but that one in particular he was looking forward to. If he could get his people used to living among people from the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribe, maybe they could one day accept a Waterbender as their Fire Lady.

Of course that was all wishful thinking. Katara was being predictably stubborn, and it was getting excruciatingly frustrating. But after what happened the night before, his hope had been restored somewhat. Despite their fight, it was obvious that she was still madly in love with him too, but she was scared to get hurt. He already knew she was protective of her heart, particularly after everything that had happened between her and Jet, and it wasn’t the first time she had run away from her feelings for him instead of admitting the truth. So he had decided to give her a little space. She had told him that she still wanted to be friends, so he would focus on that for the time being. Then, when she was ready to face the truth of what she really wanted instead of making excuses, he would be waiting patiently. It had worked the first time around, so he was tentatively hopeful that it would work again. Otherwise he would spend the rest of his life in love with someone he could never have. 

Once he was free, Zuko headed up to his room to freshen up before dinner. More than anything he wanted a nap, but he was eager to spend some more time with Katara, even if it was just as friends. When he arrived at his room he found his steward waiting for him.

“Hello Daizu,” Zuko said as he approached. 

Daizu bowed. “Good evening, my lord. How did the meetings go?”

“Well, I think. We won’t really know if our solution will work until we try it though. Do you have anything to report?” 

“Just a few things, my lord. The dignitaries from Fire Fountain City sent word that they have pushed their visit back a week, General Xen’s wife gave birth to a baby boy last night; I have already arranged for a gift to be sent, and er… I received a report this afternoon that Master Katara was um… scaring some of the servants.” 

Zuko raised an eyebrow at his last report, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Apparently she was Waterbending in the courtyard this afternoon.”

Zuko had to bite his lip to prevent the laughter that bubbled up. “That’s… all?”

“She drew quite a crowd, apparently, but some of the servants reported in and said that it was a terrifying display. I was told she er... sent a hail of ‘ice daggers’ raining down from the sky. I checked it out myself and there is some damage to one of the pavilions, but I am unsure as to her intention.” 

“I imagine she was just letting off some steam,” Zuko replied, still fighting laughter. “She probably wasn’t even aware of the crowd.”

“As you say, my lord. But um… perhaps she could do such things somewhere less trafficked? Most of the people in the Capital have never seen a Master Waterbender in action before.”

“I’ll show her the sparring grounds and ask her to go there next time,” Zuko said with a nod. “I’m sure she wouldn’t want to cause a diplomatic incident by accidently skewering some noble with an icicle.”

“Er, very good, my lord. Is there anything you need before I leave tonight?”

“No, that should be all. Thank you,” Zuko replied. 

Daizu bowed once more, and walked away. Zuko entered his room and shut the door behind him, letting out the laughter that he had been fighting to suppress. How he wished that he could have witnessed it for himself. He had seen Katara at full ferocity numerous times and he admitted that she was quite terrifying when she went all out. But he was certain she was just bending for the sake of bending, and it amused him that she had scared some of the servants. Daizu was right about most of them never having seen a Master Waterbender in action, in fact most of them had probably never even met a Waterbender at all. Most people in the Fire Nation had been raised to believe that the Water Tribe were uncivilized, uncultured weaklings, and considering most of the Waterbenders of the South were gone, it was generally assumed that Waterbending was a weak element. It must have come as a shock to see just how formidable a Master Waterbender could be. 

After washing up and changing into more comfortable clothes, Zuko headed down to the dining room for dinner. He was the last to arrive, and he joined Mai, Aang, Katara, and Iroh with an apology for being late. 

“No need to apologise, nephew. We decided to start without you,” Iroh said, digging into his dinner with a smile. 

“I can see that,” Zuko replied with a smirk.

“Aang was just telling us about the meetings this afternoon,” Mai said. “It seems you have come up with some promising ideas. Hopefully all of this tension can be put behind us.”

“I doubt it will be that easy, but with Aang’s help it should go much smoother,” Zuko replied. “Once we have established more open borders with the Earth Kingdom, I’d like to extend the same offer to the Northern and Southern Water Tribes. Ideally all three nations will one day be able to mingle without raising tensions.”

“It’s important to maintain the balance between the four elements and the nations, but having more open borders would definitely be beneficial to healing the wounds of the past,” Aang said. “Once things settle down a little, I would like to invite non-benders to come live at one of the Air Temples so I can teach them about the Air Nomads. If we can resurrect Air Nomad culture, maybe in the next couple of generations Airbenders will be born again.”

“That sounds like a lot of work,” Zuko said. “If I can help in any way, please let me know.”

“I will. Thanks Zuko,” Aang replied with a warm smile. 

Zuko nodded, digging into his food hungrily. After he had left Katara’s room, he had only managed to have a quick bite before he had to get ready and go to his first meeting. Some time after noon lunch was brought in for everyone, but at the time he didn’t have much of an appetite. He hadn’t been able to look Aang in the eye all day, in fact he still hadn’t been able to. Luckily he didn’t think the Airbender noticed, but every time Zuko tried, he felt a knot of guilt in his stomach. Though after going almost a whole day with very little to eat, his hunger had taken over. 

“Katara, you are awfully quiet. Are you alright?” Iroh asked suddenly. 

Zuko looked up from his plate, fixing his eyes on her. She had hardly touched her food, and she blushed slightly as four pairs of eyes suddenly turned on her. 

“Yeah, I’m just… tired,” she said, her eyes flicking to Zuko momentarily before returning to her plate. 

He swallowed hard and dropped his gaze, feeling the knot of guilt once more. 

“Did you not sleep well?” Aang asked.

“I… I slept fine. It’s just been a long day I guess.” 

“What did you do all day?” Aang pressed. 

“Mai and I had tea…” she said, clearly annoyed with being questioned. 

Zuko knew exactly why she was tired. It was the same reason he was tired, and he could only assume she felt as guilty about it as he did. So he decided to rescue her.

“I heard you scared some of the servants this afternoon,” he interrupted just as Aang was about to ask another question. 

Katara turned red and looked up at him guiltily. “Spirits, word really gets around fast here,” she said. 

“What happened?” Iroh asked curiously. 

“According to the report I received, Katara was… let me phrase this right… raining ice daggers down from the sky.”

Katara smacked her hand on her forehead. “I was just bending. I didn’t realize I would have an audience.”

“There are very few places you can go around here where you will not have an audience,” Mai said cryptically. 

Zuko gave her a sideways glance, wondering if she had heard something about him and Katara. Their argument had started in the garden and continued throughout the halls of the palace, so even at the late hour it was possible someone had seen them or overheard. Both of them had tried to keep their voices down, but they had both been guilty of raising their voice more than once. 

“Regardless,” Zuko said, trying to deflect Mai’s comment, “I will show you where the sparring grounds are tomorrow, and you can bend there if you like. It’s mostly used by Firebenders, so they should be less afraid of being murdered by an icicle.” 

Katara dropped her eyes to her plate. “I appreciate that… but we… we’re actually leaving tonight.” 

Zuko felt his heart drop. He didn’t have to ask why they were leaving early. 

“Oh no, did something come up?” Iroh asked. 

“Katara is eager to see her family,” Aang explained. “Since the colony business seems to be on track, we are going to head out tonight. I’ll drop Katara off at the South Pole, and then head out to the colonies to help keep the peace.” 

“That is understandable. I know I miss Zuko terribly every time I go back to Ba Sing Se,” Iroh said. “It’s why I spend more time here than I should,” he added with a laugh.

Zuko smiled at his uncle, but his heart was heavy. She was running away again, and this time he couldn’t follow. He felt a pair of eyes burning into him and he glanced up, catching Mai’s dark gaze. Her face was as expressionless as ever, but he was growing more and more certain that she could read him like a book. 

The rest of dinner past somberly. Aang and Iroh made idle small talk, but neither Zuko or Katara could muster much enthusiasm for the conversation. After they had all finished eating, Katara and Aang went to gather their things, then met Zuko, Mai, and Iroh down in the courtyard where Appa waited for them. Aang gave Zuko a hug and thanked him for his hospitality before moving on to Iroh and Mai, who had just said goodbye to Katara. She walked over to him and they stepped away from the others as much as they could without being noticed. 

“I’m sorry Zuko,” she whispered, casting a glance towards the other three to make sure they weren’t overheard. “I just… don’t trust myself.” 

She didn’t elaborate, but he knew exactly what she meant. He didn’t trust himself either. 

“I’ll miss you,” he said softly. 

“I’ll miss you too,” she replied, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment to prevent tears. 

“Don’t disappear on me again, okay? Write me once in a while, at least,” Zuko said, reaching out to gently stroke her cheek. 

She leaned into his touch momentarily, then nodded. “I promise.” 

He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly. She returned the embrace, burying her face into his shoulder. Her scent overwhelmed him, and he couldn’t help leaning in to whisper in her ear.

_“Always and forever.”_

She released a shaky breath and stepped away from him, refusing to meet his gaze. “Goodbye Zuko,” she said, then sharply turned on her heel and strode over to Appa. 

She climbed up into his saddle, followed by Aang, and then they were gone. Zuko stood, looking up to the sky as they grew smaller and smaller in the setting sun. 

“Well, I’m going to go have a nice hot bath, and get an early night, I think. Sleep well, you two,” Iroh said, giving them both a little wave before leaving Zuko and Mai standing alone in the darkening courtyard. 

Zuko remained silent, staring off at the horizon. He felt Mai move towards him, and he finally tore his eyes away. She was staring at him expectantly, arms crossed. 

“What happened?” she demanded.

“I… don’t…” 

“Zuko, I was told this morning that you and Katara got into a shouting match in the middle of the night, and I’ve seen the way you’ve been looking at her since she arrived. I’m not a fool.”

He sighed. “We just… had some unresolved things to work out.”

“Were you two together?” Mai asked bluntly. 

He knew it was no use lying to her; she already knew the truth. “...Yes. Briefly, before the end of the war.” 

“And now?” 

“Now… we’re just friends,” he replied. That much was true at least. 

Mai narrowed her eyes at him, unconvinced. “Be careful, Zuko.” 

He wasn’t sure if it was a threat or a warning, but he never got the chance to ask. She turned suddenly and strode back into the palace without another word, leaving him alone with his agony.


	3. Chapter 3

Since the end of the war, the Southern Water Tribe had transformed. Their sister tribe in the North had sent some of their most talented Waterbenders to the South Pole to help with the restoration, and over the passing months they had turned the handful of crude igloos into a sprawling city. In comparison to some of the larger cities of the world, it was rather small, but as the city grew so too did the population. With all the Southern warriors returned home, the villagers who had migrated further into the tundra to avoid the Fire Nation raids, and the return of refugees that had escaped the South Pole, Katara’s quaint village of a few dozen had become a growing hub of civilization for the South. 

Eventually the majority of the Northern Waterbenders had returned home, but the expansion seemed to be never ending. Now that the South could finally put down roots without fear of drawing a raid, they were making the most of it. This fact was most clearly reflected in just how many babies were being born as the first anniversary of the end of the war drew near. 

It had been nearly four months since Katara had returned home, and she had been stunned to see the transformation. For starters, her family no longer lived in a one room igloo. Her father now lived in a large home carved of ice, with two floors more than enough rooms for them all. Pakku and her Gran Gran lived in a far smaller house nearby, but they too had several rooms to live in. But she had hardly had time to marvel at all the new developments before she found herself busier than ever. 

Only two Waterbenders from the North had remained, both healers, and with an ever growing population they had their hands full on a daily basis. Katara spent a majority of her time helping out at the clinic they had established, and when she wasn’t needed there, she helped Pakku teach the young Waterbenders of the South. She made a point to teach each one of them both combative and healing bending, regardless of gender, a point that Pakku had acknowledged with an apologetic smile. 

The Southern Waterbenders were learning quickly, though most of them were still quite young, the oldest of them being only ten years old. But it gave Katara immeasurable joy to see them growing and learning each day, and overall she had been far happier than she had ever been following Aang around. She felt a sense of purpose, and it was gratifying. 

Aang came and went as expected, usually staying for no more than a week or two. He had his own room set up at Hakoda’s place, but as he was usually gone for weeks on end it largely sat empty. Katara found this suited her just fine. People constantly asked her if she missed Aang while he was gone, and she never really knew how to answer. She did of course; she cared about him very much. But she didn’t miss him in the way people assumed. She had actually found the time apart from him made her appreciate the time they did have together even more. She still hadn’t developed the sort of feelings for him that she had been trying to force, so his chaste kisses and romantic gestures were as awkward as ever. But she did still value his friendship, and she felt confident she could live the rest of her life content in her current state of being. 

Katara had been true to her promise and had made an effort to keep in touch with Zuko. Her insanely busy schedule had helped keep her mind off of her lingering feelings for him, and the distance and distraction had made it easier on her to focus on their friendship instead. He had kept his letters to her fairly casual, making no more confessions of love or allusions to their former relationship, and she had greatly appreciated it. It was hard enough to get over her feelings for him without the constant reminder. Katara mostly talked about how the South was developing and how great it felt to be busy, and Zuko mostly just talked about the things his uncle was getting up to and how much he hated politics. None if it was ideal, but it was where their choices had led them and she was just happy that they were finally able to communicate again. 

But as the summer months drew to an end, Katara couldn’t help but dwell on the past. The city was planning a huge celebration for the first anniversary of the end of the war, something she knew was happening all over the world, and her mind kept wandering back to those hot summer days spent on Ember Island. It was the last time she had been truly, overwhelmingly happy, and for a few days at the end she had been so sure of her future with Zuko. She had no idea then that the moment they left the beach house everything would spiral out of control. It had all slipped through her fingers so quickly and left her a shattered wreck. She kept finding herself wishing she could go back to those last few days between the comet and Zuko’s coronation and force herself to get over her stupid pride and talk to him. Maybe if she hadn’t spent all her time avoiding him, thinking that she was doing the right thing for both of them, they may have stood a chance. 

She didn’t want to dwell on the past, but with the anniversary only a few days away, it seemed to be all anyone could talk about. Obviously she was happy that the war was over and that they all had a bright future to look forward to. But try as she might, she couldn’t shake her bitter regret. Zuko had told her it wasn’t too late for them, but she wasn’t convinced. So much had changed in a year, but the Fire Lord leaving his high born Fire Nation girlfriend to date a Waterbender from the Southern Water Tribe seemed like a change the people of the Fire Nation would never be prepared for. She wasn’t convinced that breaking up with Aang would reflect well on her either, especially if she left him for the Fire Lord. After all, just a year ago the Fire Nation was reviled and hated. The three nations were slowly moving towards peace and understanding, but it would be quite the scandal all around. She didn’t want that for either of them, especially as Zuko was still so early in his rule. She had been arguing with herself since the moment Zuko had agreed to be the Fire Lord. Logically she was convinced that their relationship would never work, but her heart refused to believe that logic. 

Aang had been hoping to get the whole of Team Avatar together for the anniversary, but everyone seemed to be busy. Zuko had his own celebrations to lead, and it was vital that he remain in the Fire Nation to ensure it would _be_ a celebration. Toph had agreed to attend the festivities in Ba Sing Se, more as a favour to her parents than an actual desire to step foot in the city, and even Aang ended up not being able to stay in the South. He had received invitations from every major city across the world, and he was off trying to visit as many of them as possible. 

Even Sokka and Katara had received several invites, but they didn’t want to be anywhere else for such an important event other than with their family in their home nation. Suki however did agree to come spend the anniversary in the South, much to both Sokka and Katara’s joy. She arrived a week before the anniversary, and while Sokka had tried to hog all of her attention, Suki was eager to spend time with Katara as well. Since she had been home, Suki had only been to visit once, so both girls had missed each other immensely. 

One morning a few days before the anniversary, Katara received a letter. She recognized the seal immediately, and knew the letter was from Zuko. She preferred to read his letters alone, so she slipped it into her pocket while she finished breakfast. 

“Is that another letter from Zuko?” Hakoda asked curiously. 

“Yeah… I’ll read it after breakfast,” Katara replied, picking at her food. 

“Well let us know how he is doing,” her father said. 

Katara smiled and nodded. Hakoda was rather fond of the young Fire Lord, and he often asked after Zuko’s wellbeing. She thought it was rather sweet. 

“Zuko hardly ever writes to _me_ ,” Sokka said grumpily. 

“You got a letter from him a few weeks ago!” Katara argued. 

“Yeah, but you get twice as many…”

“I’m pretty sure she gets twice as many than any of us,” Suki said, giggling. 

Katara blushed and shrank in her seat. 

“The two of you do seem to talk quite often,” Hakoda mused. “Perhaps we should invite him to visit soon, if he can spare the time. He must miss you all.” 

“Ooh, yeah! I’ve been missing my fishing buddy,” Sokka exclaimed. 

“Hey! I fish with you!” Suki said.

“Yeah, but you never catch anything…” 

Suki frowned and tossed a salted roll at his head. He ducked, and grinned sheepishly at her, causing Katara to laugh. 

“I’ve missed this. I just wish the others were here too,” she said. 

“I appreciate your nostalgia, but can you please do so without wasting food?” Hakoda asked, giving them all a stern look. 

The three of them apologised, and Suki got up to collect the roll she had thrown. 

After breakfast Katara headed up to her room to be alone. Her heart pounding, she cracked the seal and unfurled the letter, smiling at his familiar handwriting. 

_Dearest Katara…_

_By the time this letter reaches you, it will almost be one year since the end of the war, and I must admit that I have been dwelling on the past more than I should lately. It is my job to look towards the future and guide my people towards it, but I have been so… stuck. I miss feeling the wind in my hair as we flew through the sky on Appa’s back. I miss laying in the sand under the hot summer sun. I miss Toph’s sarcasm, Sokka and Suki’s bickering, and training with Aang. Mostly I miss you. I miss our late night talks on the dock, I miss watching you Waterbend, and cooking meals together. I miss fighting by your side, knowing you had my back as I had yours._

_I wish we all could have spent this first anniversary together. I have been so lonely lately despite being surrounded by people every single day. I knew being Fire Lord wouldn’t be easy, but I never realized just how lonely it would be._

_I’m sorry for unloading this on you. But despite everything, you have always been the one person I could truly open up to, and I just… I really need you right now. You’re my best friend, and probably the one person who truly knows me. All of me. I don’t know who else to turn to. I tried talking to my uncle, but he wasn’t there with us. He doesn’t know what we all had, or the plans we had made. He doesn’t know the depth of what we have had to sacrifice or the dreams we have had to abandon. The only one who will truly understand is you. I just... wish I could hear your voice._

_Anyway, I hope your celebrations in the South are enjoyable, and I hope you are happy and well. Give my best to Sokka and your family._

_I’ll be thinking of you._

_Zuko_

Katara read the letter through once, and then again, her heart sinking. He sounded so profoundly _sad_ , and she had not been expecting it. He had mentioned in previous letters how much he missed Team Avatar and all their travelling, but she had assumed it was in the same nostalgic way that she had the others talked about it. But to be fair, the rest of them saw each other often. The exception was Toph, though Aang had seen her a few times over the past year and apparently she seemed perfectly happy to continue whatever it was that she was doing. But Katara hadn’t seen him in four months, and the rest of the gang hadn’t seen him since they had all left Ba Sing Se. Even Aang had only been back to the Capital once since the night they spent there. 

She stood and paced around her room, reading the letter through again. She didn’t know what to do. She would have to write back of course, but more than anything she wanted to pack up her things and go to him. But she had no idea when Aang would be back, and she couldn’t just steal a boat and sail all the way to the Fire Nation… couldn’t she?

There was a knock at her door and she jumped, startled out of her thoughts. She crossed the room and opened it, breathing a sigh of relief as she saw Suki on the other side. 

“Hey I wa-- are you okay?” Suki asked, suddenly concerned by the panicked look on Katara’s face. 

She shook her head and grabbed Suki’s wrist, pulling her into the room and shutting the door. 

“Katara, wha-”

She cut her off by shoving the letter into Suki’s hands. She raised an eyebrow at Katara, then raised the letter and began to read while Katara resumed her pacing. Once Suki had finished, she looked up with a frown.

“Was he like this when you saw him last?” she asked.

“No, not really. I mean… maybe he was…” she replied, now unsure.

“What do you mean maybe?”

“There.... Was a lot going on.”

Suki gave her a curious look, then sighed. “Katara, what happened?” 

Katara gave her a sheepish look, and then shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. We just… had a lot to talk about.”

Suki let out an annoyed huff and crossed the room to sit on Katara’s bed. “What happened the day of the coronation?” she asked. 

“I told you…”

“No you didn’t, you just said it was over. You never gave me the details.”

Katara gave her a sidelong glance, then sighed in defeat. “I went to go tell him how I feel, but when I got there I… saw him kissing Mai.” 

“And did you talk to him about it after?” 

“No, what good would that have done? He had already made his choice.”

“Is that why you and Aang got together?” Suki pressed.

“What? _No_ ,” Katara lied. 

Suki gave her a disbelieving scowl. “You are a _terrible_ liar Katara. You chose to be with Aang despite the fact that you don’t love him because Zuko chose Mai and you didn’t want to be alone. Do I have it right?” 

“I… I never said that I didn’t love Aang…”

“Sure, but not the way he loves you, because you’re still in love with Zuko.” 

“We are just friends!” Katara said unconvincingly. 

“Then why did you just say you went to tell him how you _feel_?”

“I… you’re misunderstanding me…”

“Am I?” Suki said smugly. “I think you are still very much in love with him, and judging by the way he wrote to you, he is still in love with you too, and he is absolutely miserable without you. You were miserable too, before you came to live here. Remember? But you have friends to distract you now, he doesn’t.”

Katara was growing increasingly uncomfortable the closer Suki got to the truth. “That… that is irrelevant.”

“Spirits Katara, you are standing in the way of your own happiness you know. _Why_ aren’t you together?”

“Because he chose Mai!” Katara shouted, tears welling in her eyes.

“Did he _tell_ you that he chose her over you? Or did you see them kissing, assume his choice was made without bothering to ask him, and then run straight into Aang’s arms to hide from your pain?” 

Katara stared at her, mouth agape. Suki always had a habit of cutting straight through all her swirling confusion to the truth in her heart. Suki took her silence as confirmation.

“So what happened when you were there?” she pressed. 

Katara hung her head and dropped onto the bed next to her friend. “He… told me that he still loves me.”

“And you got afraid of getting your heart broken again and ran away?” 

Katara scowled at her. “We have already made our choices and we can’t go back on them now. Besides, it would never work between us. Not with him as the Fire Lord.” 

Suki scoffed. “You really need to stop making excuses Katara, Just admit the truth.” 

“What truth?”

“That you are terrified of getting your heart broken again.”

“I… it’s not that simple.” 

Suki sighed in exasperation. “One of these days you are going to slip up, and yours won’t be the only heart that breaks as a result.” 

Katara hung her head in shame, not wanting to admit that she already had slipped up, or that she still didn’t trust herself around him. 

“How is any of this relevant to the fact that Zuko is hurting and lonely?” she asked, trying to change the subject.

“Because I know you. He wants _you_ specifically, and your first instinct is to go to him, isn’t it? But how can you help him if you can’t even help yourself?” 

Katara didn’t know how to answer that question, so she brushed it off. “What should I do then?”

“Write to him. Tell him you miss him too- you’re still friends, so that’s not unusual. And then invite him to come spend some time here. Your dad suggested it anyway, and that way he can see both you and Sokka at once. I’ll make sure I’m here too, so you two don’t spend the whole time pining for each other. Though honestly, I really wish you would just be together if you’re really this miserable apart.”

Katara frowned at her. She wished it was that easy. “Okay. I’ll do that then. But if I get another letter like this one, I’m heading out there myself to make sure he’s okay.”

Suki smiled. “I’m sure he will be okay. We are all feeling nostalgic right now, and it’s hard on him because he doesn’t get to see any of us often. I’ll talk to the others and see what we can do about getting out there to visit him more often. That should help a little.”

“Yeah. That’s a good idea,” Katara replied, unconvinced. 

“I’ll leave you to write a reply; I assume you want to as soon as possible. I was going to ask if you wanted to go to the market later and help me pick out some earrings, so if you’re up for it let me know.”

“Sure, I’ll come find you when I’m done.”

Suki nodded then stood and strode out of the room, leaving Katara alone with her thoughts. She really wished people would stop trying to push her when it came to Zuko. She would admit that Suki was right; she was terrified of getting her heart broken again. She was _still_ recovering from the first time. But the fact remained that there was no future for the two of them, and it was impossible to heal when she kept being reminded of it. 

She got up and crossed to her desk, pulling out a fresh piece of parchment. 

_Dear Zuko,_

_I wish that I could be there with you right now. Knowing how lonely and sad you are makes me sick with worry, and I’ll admit that I almost hopped on a ship and headed straight for you when I received your letter. You are my best friend too, and I hate that I’m not there for you. I know things have been weird between us, but no matter what I am ALWAYS here for you, even if I’m not there in person. And you never have to be sorry for leaning on me when you are down. Never. You’re right; I do know you better than anyone, just as you know me better than anyone. So you should already know that you can be honest with me. You can tell me anything._

_You should also already know just how much I miss you. We all need to get better at keeping in touch, I think. It’s been such a crazy year._

_My father asked after you again, by the way. He is hoping that you might come visit, if you have the time, and I know I would really love that too. If we planned it right we could make sure Sokka and Suki are in town as well, and maybe even Aang. It’s not quite all of us, but it’s long overdue, don’t you think?_

_I look forward to your reply, and I hope that we will see each other soon. Good luck with the anniversary celebration, and try to enjoy it a little, okay? For me?_

_I’ll be thinking of you too. I always am._

_Katara_

She wasn’t at all satisfied with her answer, but she was afraid she would say too much. Hopefully it would at least cheer him a little to know that she missed him too, and to receive an invitation to visit. She rolled up the parchment and sealed it, then left her room. Suki had been waiting downstairs for her, and together they left for the rookery to send the letter before heading into the market. Katara didn’t really feel like shopping, but at least it was something to distract her swirling thoughts.

XXXX

Zuko had received Katara’s letter a few days after the anniversary celebration in the Capital. It had gone surprisingly well; most of the people in the Capital city were still adjusting to this new way of life, but many of the smaller villages around the Fire Nation had suffered because of the war, and they were all overjoyed to see its end. People from every corner of the Fire Nation showed up to celebrate, and even the locals couldn’t help but join in on the festivities. 

Most of the people who actively supported the war and wished for it to continue after Ozai’s defeat had been jailed or stripped of power, so there weren’t many people left who actually mourned the end of the war, but he understood that a lot of citizens, especially the wealthy and the noble population, were having a hard time wrapping their heads around the fact that the Fire Nation had been responsible for so much pain and violence. It was pure ignorance, and while they were learning, it would take time for them to truly see the benefit of peace. 

It had been a huge relief to see the celebrations go so well, and now that it was all over he felt much lighter. By the time he got Katara’s letter he felt embarrassed that he had ever sent his in the first place. He had written it during a dark mood; he had been in meetings all day while trying to juggle preparations for the anniversary, and on top of it all he missed his friends fiercely. 

He had been extremely lonely, that much was true. But he realized how worried Katara must have been reading his letter and he felt bad for it. Her words had touched him though, and he was happy to see that she still cared for him as much as ever, even if she insisted on remaining friends. It also touched him that Chief Hakoda had personally invited him to stay, and he intended on accepting the invitation. 

Zuko had told his Counsel of the invitation, making sure to stress the point that Hakoda himself had extended it. He had been prepared to argue his case for going, but much to his surprise, the Counsel all agreed that it would be a good idea. They believed that it was time to reach out to the Water Tribe and extend a friendly hand towards both the North and the South. They had spent most of the previous year getting their own nation in order and smoothing tensions with the Earth Kingdom, but it was time to involve the Water Tribe as well. 

So a few weeks after receiving the invitation, Zuko found himself on a ship towards the South Pole. Mai had decided not to come, which wasn’t a surprise. Zuko knew that she hated travelling, but he also suspected she didn’t want to see Katara, and he definitely understood. Iroh however had been asked along and had accepted enthusiastically. The trip reminded Zuko of the days he spent searching for the Avatar, just him, his uncle, and a small crew. Though this time they had royal guards as well for Zuko’s safety. 

As they drew close to the South Pole, Zuko could already tell from a distance just how much it had changed. The last time he had been there, the village was just a few dozen snowy huts surrounded by a single wall. Now he could see an actual port, littered with ships of all sizes, and a road that led to a sprawling city. It wasn’t as large as the North Pole, with it’s grand palace and towering walls of ice, but as they got closer to the port he could see proper houses made of snow and ice, as well as quite a few larger buildings that looked to be public areas. None of the buildings seemed to be higher than two stories, so he could see clear through to the other side of the city from his vantage point. There was a large wall of ice that surrounded the entirety of it; he guessed it was about ten feet tall. He assumed it was more or less to keep wild animals from wandering into the city then for defense.

Once they had docked, Zuko had barely made it down the ramp before he heard someone shout his name, and he was practically tackled into a hug. 

“Zuko!!! I missed you so much!” Sokka said, squeezing him tightly. 

He laughed and returned the hug. “I’ve missed you too buddy.”

Sokka released him and turned to Iroh, giving him a hug as well. “I’ve saved all my best jokes for you,” he said. 

“I look forward to hearing them,” Iroh replied with a grin. 

Suki appeared next, giving Sokka an exasperated look. “Sorry about him,” she said, embracing Zuko. “It’s really good to see you.”

“It’s fine, I’ve missed this,” Zuko replied with a laugh. “And it’s good to see you too.”

Suki stepped back and gave him a once-over, nodding in approval. “You’re looking good, Zuko. This Fire Lord thing suits you.”

Zuko blushed and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. Suki laughed and patted his shoulder before moving on to greet Iroh. As Suki moved away, he looked up and saw Katara standing before him, smiling shyly. His breath caught in his throat at the sight of her. Half of her hair was pulled away off of her face, tied in a knot at the back of her head, the rest left down to softly cascade around her shoulders. He longed to reach out and run his fingers through the loose locks, but he resisted. 

Katara moved forward and after a moment of hesitation, she wrapped her arms around him. He returned the gesture immediately, pulling her close and melting into her embrace. He closed his eyes, breathing in her salty, floral scent, and for a brief moment he felt her bury her face into his chest. But the moment passed quickly. She pulled away, letting her hands rest on his chest. His own lingered on her waist, and he looked down at her wistfully. 

“It’s good to see you,” he said softly. 

Katara smiled at him, but before she could reply they heard someone clear their throat behind her. Zuko looked up and saw Hakoda, giving them a curious look. Katara pulled away from him, turning her face to hide her blush and moved to greet Iroh. 

“Fire Lord Zuko,” Hakoda said, bowing.

Zuko bowed in return. “Chief Hakoda. Thank you for inviting me,” he replied, reaching out to clasp arms.

Hakoda returned the gesture, and grinned. “I’m glad you could make it. And please, just _Hakoda_ is fine. We aren’t so formal here.”

Zuko smiled and nodded. “Good to hear, because I vastly prefer informality. Simply _Zuko_ is fine as well.”

Hakoda nodded. “I figured as much. Come, let’s get you and both settled before you freeze to death.”

Zuko grinned, and Hakoda turned to lead him and Iroh towards his home. The ship’s crew had requested to sleep aboard the ship, but his four guards trailed them through the city, much to Zuko’s annoyance. 

They were led to a large, two story home, and Hakoda invited them all inside. Despite being a structure made purely of ice and snow, it was actually quite warm and comfortable inside. The floor was littered with furs, there was a crackling fire lit at the far end of the main room, and plenty of torches set in the wall, making the home bright. Hakoda led them upstairs to where the bedrooms were.

“My room is down the end of the hall there, Katara’s room is there, and that is Sokka’s and Aang’s,” he said, pointing at each door. “Zuko, you’ll be here, and Iroh, the room next door. Why doesn’t everyone freshen up, and we can go see Pakku at the Waterbending school? I know he is eager to see you, Iroh.”

“That sounds perfect, thank you,” Iroh replied. 

“Let’s all meet downstairs in ten minutes then.”

Hakoda gave them a nod, then turned and headed back down the stairs. Zuko saw Katara give him a small smile, then disappear into her bedroom as Sokka and Suki headed into Sokka’s room across the hall. Zuko entered his room and was pleasantly surprised with how cozy it was. Despite the floors and walls being made of ice, the torches burning inside and the furs that littered the floors made it quite warm. The bed in the corner was piled high with thick blankets and even more furs, and he was looking forward to burrowing under them later. 

He dropped his bag onto the bed and rifled through it, pulling out a small box tied with a ribbon. He stared at it for a moment then slipped it into his pocket before reaching up and removing his crown, setting it down on the table next to the bed. He let his hair fall loose, breathing a sigh as the tension washed away. With nothing left to do, he left his room and headed down the hall, stopping in front of Katara’s door. He hesitated, feeling nervous. But before he had a chance to knock, the door opened. Katara stood before him, a shocked look on her face. 

“Er… hi,” she said, recovering.

Zuko rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “Hey,” he replied dumbly. 

“You’re hair has gotten longer,” Katara said, reaching up to touch his dark locks, which now fell nearly to his shoulders. “It looks good.”

He froze as she touched him, feeling a jolt of hot desire pulse through him. She pulled away and he let out a slow breath. “Thanks.”

“Did you need something?” she asked, giving him a quizzical look. 

He swallowed hard, trying to shake his longing for her. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the box, handing it to her. “I wanted to give you this.”

She took it, her curiosity growing. “What is it?” 

“It’s a gift.”

“I can see that,” Katara laughed. “Why are you giving me a gift?”

“You turned sixteen a few days ago. I missed your last birthday with… everything that was going on after the war, so I wanted to make sure I got you something this year. Er… happy birthday.” 

Katara blushed and looked down at the box with a smile. “Thank you,” she said softly. 

They stood in awkward silence for a moment, shyly avoiding each other’s gaze. Then Zuko gestured at the box. “The gift is inside the box, you know,” he said with a smirk.

“Oh! Right,” she said, her blush growing. 

She gently pulled the ribbon to untie the knot, then lifted the lid of the box. Inside was a hairpin; it was fairly simple and made of smooth gold, similar to the hairpin Zuko wore as his crown. Only instead of the common Fire Nation flame, it had a crescent moon at the top. Katara gasped softly as she laid eyes on it, and she reached out to touch the smooth metal with her fingertips. 

“I thought of you the second I spotted it,” Zuko said, picking up the hairpin. 

He reached up and slid it into the knot of hair behind her head, then gently touched her cheek. She stared at him longingly, gently touching his hand with her fingers.

“Thank you Zuko, I love it,” she breathed. 

The door behind Zuko suddenly opened, and they jumped apart. Katara blushed deeply as Suki emerged, giving them both a stern look as she spotted them. Sokka appeared behind her, craning his neck to see why his girlfriend had suddenly stopped in the doorway.

“Oh, hey guys! Wow Zuko, your hair is longer than mine,” he said, squeezing past Suki. 

“Er, yeah. I’ve been growing it out,” Zuko replied awkwardly, sidestepping away from Katara.

Zuko could see Suki’s gaze fixed intensely on Katara, as if they were silently communicating, and she withered under her friend’s stare. 

“Katara, where’d you get that?” Sokka asked, pointing to the hairpin. 

“Erm… Zuko gave it to me. For my birthday,” she replied, avoiding Suki’s eyes. 

“Why do you get gifts??” he exclaimed.

“Your birthday was months ago, mine was a few days ago,” Katara said, rolling her eyes. 

“Come on, let’s not keep your dad waiting,” Suki said, pushing Sokka down the hall, casting one last sharp look to Katara.

She and Zuko exchanged a sheepish look, then followed their friends. 

The rest of the day passed in a flurry of activity. After visiting Pakku, they had taken Zuko and Iroh on a tour of the city. Zuko had been vastly underprepared for the cold however, and despite being a Firebender who usually ran quite hot, he spent most of the tour trying not to shiver. Eventually they made their way back to Hakoda’s place for dinner, and he was glad to be back in the warm home. They spent the rest of the evening chatting and catching up before drifting up to bed for an early night. 

Aang was scheduled to arrive the next day, and Sokka wanted to get in some fishing with Zuko before he arrived and they had no more free time to do it. But when Zuko woke early as usual the next morning, he was surprised to see Sokka already awake. He tossed a thick coat at him.

“I packed us breakfast, so we can eat on the way out!” he said. “Put that on, you’ll need it. I have some boots for you too… they should fit, but I can find something else if they don’t.”

Zuko gave him an amused look and slipped the coat on. It was fur lined and quite toasty, but considering how chilly he had been wandering about the city, he was glad to have something thicker. He tried on the boots next. They were a little big, but they would do the trick. 

“Alright, let’s go,” he said, turning to an eagerly waiting Sokka. 

They left the house and marched across the snow towards the port. The main docks moored all of the larger ships, but a ways down the coast there was a smaller dock where several smaller boats were tied. Sokka led him towards one, gesturing for him to sit before handing him the fishing equipment. Zuko settled in and set their supplies aside as Sokka untied the ropes, then pushed the boat out from the dock, hopping in with practiced ease. He picked up the oars and began to steer them away from the dock.

“We’ll have to row ourselves without Katara, but we aren’t going too far anyway. I know a good spot not far from here,” Sokka said. 

“I’d probably crash us into an iceberg, but if you want help just let me know,”” Zuko said with a smirk. 

“Nah, I’ve got it. Why don’t you dig our breakfast out of that bag there?” 

Zuko nodded and grabbed the nearby sack, pulling open the drawstring. He rummaged through it and found a bundle of cloth, containing some bread and dried meats. He pulled it out and sorted it into two portions, handing one over to Sokka before digging into his own, enjoying the salty flavour as they floated silently out past ice floats and into the early morning light. The sun was peeking over the glacial mountains now, casting a soft, golden glow over the snowy peaks and the tundra below. It was absolutely magnificent. 

“It’s so beautiful out here… I had no idea,” he said thoughtfully. 

“Yeah, it’s pretty great, isn’t it?” Sokka replied, looking around with a smile. “We’ve seen some really cool places in our travels, but I really did miss this view.” 

“I’m glad I got to see it,” Zuko said, wishing he could have been sharing it with Katara instead. 

They rowed along for another half an hour before Sokka finally pulled up the oars and settled in. He prepared their rods, handing Zuko’s over once he had placed some bait on the hook, and once they were all set they both cast their lines and sat back to wait. Zuko hadn’t been fishing since the Gang had been hiding out on Ember Island together, and he was grateful for the chance to get away and spend a few hours away from guards, politicians, and paperwork. He was also glad to be spending some quality time with Sokka, who he hadn’t seen in a year. Much to anyone’s surprise, the two of them actually had a lot in common, and despite the obvious difference in their humour and temperament, they approached life in general with a very similar view. Ever since their trip to the Boiling Rock, Zuko had been very appreciative of Sokka and his friendship.

“So… while I have you alone, I wanted to tell you something,” Sokka said suddenly, breaking Zuko out of his thoughts.

“Oh? What’s up?” 

“Well I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about my future and what I want to do with my life and all that. Eventually I’m going to have to settle down here and take over for my father,” Sokka began. “I’m sure you know better than anyone how big of a task leading is, but I want to do it. I think I will be good at it.” 

“You will be,” Zuko confirmed. 

Sokka smiled, but continued. “The past year has been great, travelling back and forth to Kyoshi Island and helping train new warriors and all that, but I just… feel like it’s time for me to really start focusing on the future, you know?” 

Zuko nodded, his mind once again drifting to Katara. 

“So… I’ve decided to ask Suki to marry me.”

This caught Zuko’s attention, and he sat up with a surprised look. “What? Really?” 

“We’ve been together over a year now, and I know it seems short, but I’m so _sure_. I know I want to be with her forever. And I know we are still pretty young, but I don’t _feel_ young, you know?”

Zuko laughed. “I do know, and I don’t think you’re too young. None of us are really; we have lived more in the past few years than most people have in a lifetime.” Zuko sighed. “Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you are too young or too inexperienced, or that you don’t know what you want. You are more than capable of knowing what you want and being ready for it, especially after everything you have faced. And if anyone ever tries to convince you otherwise, ask them where _they_ were the day the war ended.”

Sokka grinned. “I take it you have had to tell more than your fair share of people that?”

“More than I’d care to, yeah. But it works every time.”

“I guess taking down an entire fleet of Fire Nation airships does earn me a little respect, huh?” 

“Definitely,” Zuko said, grinning at him. “And don’t ever let someone make you think otherwise. Just because we are young in years, doesn’t mean that we are young in experience or in our souls.”

“Aww Zuko, you’re so poetic,” Sokka teased. 

Zuko laughed. “If you say so. Anyway, I’m happy for you Sokka.”

“She still has to say yes,” he replied nervously. 

“She will. Anyone who has spent five minutes with you two can see that you’re madly in love, so I’d be _shocked_ if she turned you down.” 

Sokka grinned. “Yeah, she’s so great.” 

Zuko chuckled. “You both are.”

“What about you? Have you thought about marriage or anything?” Sokka asked.

“Er…” Zuko’s mind immediately went to Katara, and he blushed. “No, not really.”

“How are things with you and Mai anyway?” 

“It’s.... fine,” Zuko shrugged. 

“Wow Zuko, don’t gush too hard or you’ll make me blush,” Sokka replied sarcastically. 

“To be honest… I don’t really think either of us are in love with each other. We tried to give it a fair shot, but our hearts weren’t in it.” 

“So why are you still together?”

“Who else would we be with?” Zuko answered sadly. 

“Well you’ll never find out if you stay with someone you don’t want to be with.” 

“It’s… not that simple,” Zuko replied, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. 

“Seems pretty simple to me. Mai’s… er… nice and all, but if you don’t love her, you shouldn’t be together.”

“Mai and I are… comfortable. I suppose. She gets to live a comfortable life, and I don’t have to deal with every noble in the Fire Nation throwing their daughters in my path. It’s not ideal, but it works.”

“Well what if one of those noble girls is the person you’re supposed to be with?”

Zuko sighed and looked out over the water, knowing in his heart that he could court every girl in the Fire Nation and not one of them would compare to the one Waterbender who had stolen his heart. 

“Wait… _is_ there someone already?” Sokka exclaimed. 

“Er…” 

Zuko hesitated, not sure how to answer. Sokka laughed, taking his silence as confirmation. 

“Well who is it?? And why aren’t you with them? Tell me, tell me!” 

“I don’t know Sokka… it’s not like I have much of a chance anyway.”

“Why not?? You’re the _Fire Lord_.”

“And she’s with someone else,” Zuko sighed. 

“Again… _Fire Lord_. What guy could compete with that?”

Zuko laughed in spite of himself. “If I said it was Suki, would you still think that?” 

Sokka’s grin faded, and he frowned. “It’s not--”

“No of course not,” Zuko interrupted. “But my title has nothing to do with it.”

“Point taken... but I still want to know who it is.”

“I really don’t think you do, Sokka,” Zuko replied with a sigh. 

“Why not? I’d only be upset if it was Suki, and you said it isn’t. Unless…” 

Sokka’s mouth dropped and he stared at Zuko with an incredulous look. “My _sister_?” 

Zuko grimaced at him. “I told you that you didn’t want to know…” 

“You… _Katara_???” Sokka squeaked.

Suddenly he gasped, and he pointed at Zuko emphatically. “ _That’s_ why you gave her that present!”

“I suppose. I just thought she’d like it.” 

“I can’t believe you like my _sister_!” 

“Okay Sokka, are you done?” 

He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, then he nodded. 

“Like I said, I don’t have much of a chance. So there’s really no need to freak out.”

“UHM, yes there is! First of all, ew. Second, when??? And why??”

Zuko smirked and shook his head. “Considering she is your sister, I really don’t expect you to understand why I have feelings for her, Sokka. But… I’ve been in love with her since before the end of the war.”

“Wait, you’re in _love_ with her?” 

Zuko blushed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah. Very much so.”

“Aw man… that’s rough…” Sokka said, looking genuinely sorry for him. “Does she know?” 

“Yeah… she knows.”

“Ouch… I’m sorry Zuko. Really,” Sokka said, ruefully. 

“Thanks Sokka, I appreciate it,” he replied, giving his friend a smile. 

“Honestly I don’t know why she’s with Aang anyway. They barely ever see each other, and even when he is around she doesn’t spend much time with him. Their whole relationship is super weird.” 

Zuko frowned. He knew exactly why she was with him, but he really didn’t want to unload their long, emotional relationship drama on Sokka.

“For what it’s worth… I hope she comes around. I love Aang and all, but… they don’t work. I just want everyone to be happy,” Sokka added.

“Well for now, let's focus on you and Suki. That will make everyone happy, I’m sure,” Zuko said, smiling.

Sokka grinned, and mercifully dropped the subject.

After a few hours they had caught a few fish each and headed back to the city. Aang was due to arrive soon, and they didn’t want to miss his arrival, especially since Zuko and Iroh were scheduled to leave the next day. He had wanted to stay in the South longer, but his Council had arranged for him to visit the North Pole as well before finally returning home, so he only had a couple of days to spend in both locations. It was probably for the best anyway, as he could only take so much of Aang fawning over Katara. 

XXXX

Katara had spent the morning at the clinic helping out a bit. She had taken a few days off for Zuko’s visit, but since he went out with Sokka early in the morning she decided to pop in and help out for a bit. It had been a fairly slow day, so shortly before noon she headed home, knowing Aang would be arriving soon. 

As she headed up the street to her house, she saw two figures approaching from the opposite direction. She met up with them in front of the house, and her eyes fell on Zuko immediately. He was wearing one of Sokka’s coats; blue with white fur trim and a large, fur-lined hood. She had never seen him in Water Tribe clothing before, and it made her heart skip a beat. She stopped, her eyes unintentionally sweeping over him as heat rose in her cheeks. Zuko definitely noticed, and he froze as well, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. 

Sokka looked between the two of them, then gave Zuko what looked to be a sympathetic pat on the back before grabbing the fish and supplies he had been carrying. 

“I’ll just take this inside…” he said, rushing into the house. 

Katara bit her lip, unable to tear her eyes away from him. Obviously she had always found him attractive, but seeing him in Water Tribe clothing made him all the more appealing. She wondered if she had the same effect when she was wearing Fire Nation clothes, and the thought made her blush deepen. 

“”Hey… did you have fun?” she asked, forcing herself to look in his eyes and stop checking him out.

“Yeah, it was really nice to spend some time with Sokka. We had a lot of catching up to do. He… he lent me a coat,” he replied, catching her eyes wandering over him again. 

She mentally kicked herself, turning her gaze to the snow at her feet to hide her embarrassment. “It suits you,” she said. 

Before he could reply, they saw a shadow pass over them. They both looked up and saw the familiar shape of Appa soar over them, then circle around and descend. They shared a brief, longing glance as Appa landed, each of them forcing a smile. Aang jumped down from the saddle and strode over to Katara, sweeping her up into his arms with a chase kiss. She could see Zuko behind Aang, watching them with a pained look. 

Aang turned and walked over to Zuko, giving him a hug. 

“It’s so good to see you outside of the Fire Nation!” he exclaimed. 

“Yeah… it’s good to get away,” he replied, feigning a smile.

“Let’s go inside,” Katara said, turning and heading into the house without waiting for an answer. 

She felt guilt bubbling up within her again. Since their night in the Fire Nation she had tried her best to put her guilt behind her; it wasn’t so hard with Aang away so frequently. But seeing Aang and Zuko together, and knowing in her heart which of the two she truly wanted, made it all come crashing back. 

They entered the house and spotted Sokka storing the caught fish in an ice box. He looked up as they came in and smiled awkwardly at the three of them.

“H-hey Aang! How was the trip?” he said, dumping the last of the fish into the ice box and strolling over to them.

“It was good! I think we are making some real progress with the former colonies,” Aang replied as he moved away from the door to hug Sokka. 

Katara saw her brother cast a sympathetic look towards Zuko, and she frowned suspiciously. She slipped out of her jacket and draped it over her arm as she watched Suki and Hakoda greet Aang. She noted with lingering sadness that she was not nearly as excited to see him as her friends were. Zuko removed his coat as well, and Katara reached out to take it from him, needing an excuse to escape the room. 

“I’ll take it for you,” she said, avoiding his eyes. 

He hesitated, then handed it over. “Thanks Katara,” he said softly. 

She nodded and dashed from the room and up the stairs. She stopped at Sokka’s room, opening the door and draping the coat over the end of the bed before heading to her own room. She tossed her own coat onto the chair by her desk then threw herself face down onto her bed, letting out a frustrated scream that she muffled with her pillow. After a few minutes she got back up with a heavy sigh. She crossed to the mirror in the corner of her room and fixed her hair, then headed back downstairs. 

During dinner that night Katara had despairingly found herself sandwiched between Zuko and Aang. Zuko seemed to be somber, and he sat stiffly as if he were afraid to move and accidentally touch her. Aang thankfully seemed oblivious, and he regaled them with stories from his recent trip to the Earth Kingdom colonies. She had noticed however that Sokka had been giving Zuko strange looks all day, and she was starting to worry that he might know something. She racked her brain trying to recall if she and Zuko had done or said anything to make him suspicious, but she couldn’t think of anything in particular. Despite a few looks here and there, they had both done remarkably well at keeping their feelings in check. 

“Katara? Did you hear me?” Aang’s voice said suddenly, causing her to break from her thoughts and look up from her plate, where she had been pushing her food around. 

“Uh… yeah sorry… what did you say?” she said, forcing herself to focus.

“I asked if you remember Aunt Wu, that fortuneteller from Makapu Village. I ran into her a couple weeks ago,” Aang repeated, looking annoyed. 

“Oh, yeah I remember her. How is she?” Katara replied, forcing a smile. 

“She’s fine… I was just saying that she made a comment about being happy to see that both yours and my fortunes were coming true.”

“Oh…” Katara blushed, wishing she could get up and leave.

“What _did_ she say to you anyway?” Aang asked. 

Sokka scoffed. “It’s all nonsense anyway. She probably just said that Katara was going to buy new shoes or something stupid like that,” he said. 

Aang shook his head. “What she told me came true. She told me to trust my heart and I would be with the one I love,” he replied, grinning at Katara, who shrank in her seat. 

She could feel everyone’s eyes on her, and her face went red. 

“Aunt Wu knew that we were together and she said she was happy our fortunes were coming true,” Aang continued. “So was yours something similar?”

She looked up at his hopeful face, feeling awful. “She… she told me I would… marry a powerful bender,” Katara mumbled.

Aang grinned in delight, flushing furiously. Katara turned away from him once more, risking a sidelong glance at Zuko, whose eyes were fixed on her. As much as he was struggling to hide his emotions, Katara could see right through his fragile facade and saw the pain behind his eyes. It made her heart ache. 

“Well, um… I mean, everything else she said came true, right?” Aang stammered awkwardly, still grinning. 

“Yeah, except for the part where she falsely predicted that the volcano wouldn’t erupt and then it did and nearly destroyed the village,” Sokka said, watching Zuko with a frown. “Don’t plan your whole life based on some con artist.”

Aang's grin faltered, but as he returned to his plate Katara could see the optimism in his eyes. She pushed her plate away, having lost her appetite. The last thing she needed was for Aang to have it fixed in his mind that they would marry someday. She supposed it wasn’t an impossibility, but she _needed_ to get over her feelings for Zuko before she would even consider saying yes. She already felt guilty enough.

The conversation mercifully moved on, but Katara couldn’t bring herself to listen. She stared at her abandoned plate for a while, listening to the dull drone of the voices around her, before suddenly pushing her chair back and standing. 

“I’m not feeling well… I’m going to go lie down,” she said.

“What’s wrong? Can we help?” Hakoda asked, concerned. 

“N-no, I’m sure I’ll be fine. I just… have a headache,” she lied. 

“Alright, if you’re sure,” her father replied. 

As she left the room she could feel Zuko’s eyes on her still, and it took all of her strength to hold back her tears until she had gotten up the stairs and shut her bedroom door behind her. 

She stayed in her room for the rest of the evening, laying on her bed and staring up at the ceiling as the darkness of night settled upon her. She had passed the time thinking of Zuko and all the passionate kisses they had shared, and it left her feeling heavy. She had been trying so hard to just be friends with Zuko, but it was proving impossible. It was much easier to pretend when he wasn’t around, but one glance at his golden eyes made her knees weak. There was an irresistible magnetic pull between them, and the harder she pulled away, the more difficult it was to keep fighting it. It was absolutely maddening. 

As the darkness grew, Katara heard a soft knock at her door. She sighed. _‘Please don’t let that be him…’_ she thought as she pushed herself up off of the bed. She crossed the room and opened the door. Sure enough, it was Zuko. He stood in the hall, looking crestfallen. 

“Have you been sitting here in the dark this whole time?” he said, noting the blackened room behind her. 

“I… was asleep,” she lied. 

He frowned at her, then with a wave of his hand he summoned flames to the torches in her room. Katara squinted at the sudden brightness. 

“You really are a terrible liar.” 

She scowled at him and crossed her arms, but didn’t argue. She knew there was no use lying to him, he saw through her every time. “What are you doing here?” she asked, changing the subject.

“I was worried about you,” he replied with a shrug. 

Katara sighed, then briefly leaned into the hallway to check for any eavesdroppers. “You really shouldn’t be up here, Zuko.”

“Why? Am I not allowed to check on my friend?” he retorted, annoyed. 

“Because I don’t want to make another mistake,” Katara hissed. 

Zuko signed and leaned heavily against the doorframe, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers. He was so close to her, and the scent of spice and fire overwhelmed her. She breathed hard, struggling to resist the urge to kiss him.

“Katara, if you just want to be friends, I can live with that. Not well, mind you. It’s absolute torture, but I can. But you aren’t making this easy,” Zuko said softly. “Every time I look at you, you’re either staring back at me like you want to rip my clothes off, or you run away and hide, leaving me to wonder if you’re going to vanish on me again.”

Katara blushed, the idea of her ripping his clothes off stuck in her mind. Zuko reached up and brushed a stray lock of hair off of her face, then gently rested his fingers on her jaw, letting his thumb graze the corner of her mouth. His touch was like electricity. 

“I don’t want to lose you, Katara. You know this. I won’t beg you to be with me if you’re convinced we shouldn’t be, but _please_ consider how terrified it makes me every time you flee because you’re struggling with your heart.”

Katara let out a shaky breath, adding Zuko’s fears to the list of things she felt guilty about. Without thinking, she stepped forward and placed a hand on his chest, grasping at his shirt with her fingers. Her strength was fading fast, and she felt herself pulling him in. 

“Katara?” Aang’s voice suddenly rang out.

They jumped apart and Zuko backed away from her doorway. Katara stepped into the hall, spotting Aang standing a few feet away giving them a confused look. She paled, wondering just how much he had seen and heard. 

“Hey Aang!” Katara said, her voice suddenly an octave higher. 

“I just came to check on you,” Aang said, eyeing Zuko suspiciously. 

“I… should go,” Zuko muttered. “Um… goodnight Katara… Aang.”

He turned and brushed past the Airbender, who watched him walk down the hall with a scowl until he disappeared into his bedroom. Once Zuko’s door was firmly shut, he turned back to Katara.

“Why was Zuko here?” he asked, his tone edged with jealousy.

“He… just wanted to ask if I was feeling better,” she lied. 

Aang eyed her, unsure if she was telling the truth, but much to Katara’s relief he seemed to believe her. It seemed he hadn’t seen or heard much, if anything, and she breathed a silent sigh of relief. 

“So are you?” Aang asked.

“Um… a little. But I think I’m just going to go to bed early. I’ll feel better tomorrow.”

“Yeah, okay. Zuko’s leaving tomorrow, so you’ll want to make sure you’re well enough to say goodbye,” Aang said with an edge of bitterness. 

Katara frowned at him. “What does that mean?” 

Aang shrugged. “I dunno, you tell me. You’ve been acting super weird.”

“I haven’t been acting any different than normal,” she lied. 

“Is there something going on between you and Zuko?” Aang suddenly blurted out. 

Katara was stunned, and gaped at him as she searched her brain for an answer. “W-why would you think that??” 

“Like I said, you’ve been acting weird. You both have,” Aang said, pouting angrily. 

“We’re just friends, Aang,” she insisted. 

He scowled up at her, but couldn’t seem to find a trace of a lie in her words. He sighed. “Alright…” he said, turning away. “I’m going to bed. See you in the morning.”

“Okay… goodnight Aang…” 

She watched as he walked to his room, shutting the door hard behind him. Katara let out a low breath, but was unable to shake the tension within her. She had to be more careful, or she wouldn’t be the only one to get burned.


	4. Chapter 4

Nearly another year had passed by the time Zuko and Katara saw each other again. They had exchanged letters back and forth, and over the months their words were less forced and cautious. It seemed that the distance and the time apart had helped them focus on their friendship instead of their lingering feelings, and though he couldn’t speak for Katara, Zuko was finding it much easier to get through a whole day without crippling despair tearing at his heart. 

Of course he often still lay awake at night, watching the moonlight shadows dance across his room and thinking of Katara’s sweet scent and warm lips. But at the very least, he was grateful that she was still sending him frequent letters.

In the first few weeks after he had left the South, Katara had written to tell him how suspicious Aang had been on his final night there. She had told him about the accusations he made, and that while Aang seemed to believe that she and Zuko were just friends, he had been short and annoyed with her for several days following. Zuko definitely understood why Aang would be upset, but he hated the fact that he had held a grudge against Katara for so long instead of trying to talk to her and work it out. He had written back with his sympathies, having seriously considered mentioning how childish Aang was acting, and pointing out that it was not something she should have to tolerate in her partner. But he had refrained, not wanting to unintentionally push her away. 

Zuko had definitely noticed that Aang had made less of an effort to drop in to visit however. He only saw him a few times over the following months, and it was always for business. He was friendly enough, but Zuko suspected that Aang thought he was trying to steal his girlfriend. And while Zuko wasn’t necessarily trying to steal her away, he certainly wished for it, so he couldn’t even be mad.

About a month after he left the south, he received a letter from Sokka informing him that he had followed through on their discussion and proposed to Suki. As expected, she had said yes, and they were planning on getting married in the South Pole the following summer. Their plan was to have Suki move to the South permanently after winter, where they would move into their own home. She would still travel back to Kyoshi Island every so often to check in on the warriors, but as they were already thriving, Suki’s presence wasn’t particularly needed. She was looking forward to helping Sokka train the Southern Warriors, using their blended fighting styles. 

Zuko was overjoyed for them, and was happy to hear that they had a plan all worked out. Having them train new warriors for the Southern Water Tribe using both Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom fighting styles was exactly the kind of cross-nation blending that Zuko had been working towards since the end of the war. Of course he was hoping to blend the Fire Nation in too, but Sokka and Suki were set to be a shining example of how successful international relationships could be. 

Aang had been working on his own project for much of the year. He had returned to the Southern Air Temple, his original home, and had spent a great deal of time cleaning and restoring it. He had invited non-benders from the three nations who were willing to learn the ways of the Air Nomads to come and live there, and within weeks of the word going out he had received a few dozen volunteers from all three nations. Over the months he had been spending most of his time at the Temple, attempting to mold his new citizens into Air Nomads, and from what Zuko had heard, he was doing fairly well. It would likely take years, if not longer, to fully recreate Air Nomad society, but it was worth the try anyway. 

Toph had finally settled down, having decided to open up a Metalbending academy in the Earth Kingdom. She had been vague about what she had spent the year after the war doing, but when Zuko received a letter from her one day in the early spring, she had mentioned that she already had a handful of students, so he suspected that she had been searching the Earth Kingdom for Earthbenders that showed promise. 

As the summer drew closer and the wedding approached, Zuko was eager to get back to the South. He wanted to see Katara of course, but it would also be the first time all of his friends would be in the same place since the end of the war, and he was really looking forward to it. He missed them all terribly. Even Mai had agreed to come, and was looking forward to it. Zuko knew this was entirely because Ty Lee would be there, and they hadn’t seen each other in nearly two years.

Zuko, Mai, and Iroh left the Fire Nation Capital several days before the day of the wedding, and were due to arrive the day before. They had an entourage of guards, as well as other guests who had been invited who Zuko had offered to ferry to the South aboard his ship, so the journey had not passed quietly. Zuko had spent most of his time in his room, trying to avoid the excited cacophony from his shipmates. By the time they had finally arrived, he was ready to throw himself into the sea for a little peace and quiet. 

They were met on the docks by Hakoda and Pakku, as well as several others, but Zuko saw no trace of his friends as he descended the ramp and approached the waiting group.

“Zuko, it’s so good to see you again,” Hakoda said, grasping his arm, with a warm smile. 

“It’s good to see you too Hakoda. It’s been too long,” Zuko replied. 

“I’m sure you’re wondering where all your friends are,” Hakoda said, catching Zuko scan the crowd. “I’m sure you can imagine how busy we have all been. They wanted to be here but we have had people arriving from all over for days, and they’re busy entertaining. But they should all be heading back to my place for lunch by now.”

“Honestly I’m surprised you found time to come greet us. I assumed you’d be busier than anyone,” Zuko replied. 

Hakoda laughed. “That’s an understatement. But I’ve perfected the art of being in many places at once.”

“I have definitely been honing that particular talent as well over the last two years,” Zuko laughed. 

“I doubt you were left with much choice,” Hakoda replied, clapping Zuko on the back. “Come on, let’s get you settled before lunch.”

He led the group into the town, walking astride Zuko and chatting casually. It made Zuko happy that he and Hakoda got along so well, not just because of his connection to Katara, but because he genuinely liked the man. He had a great deal of respect for him and it had always touched him that Hakoda had treated him almost like a son.

“So we have been struggling to find rooms for everyone, as we have many _many_ guests. We have Iroh in Sokka’s old room across from Katara, Toph will be staying in the room next to hers once she arrives, and Chief Arnook and his wife are down the opposite hall next to Aang and myself. Suki and Sokka have two extra rooms, one of which Ty Lee is staying in, and the other will be for you and Mai, if you are fine to share. I figured you might be more comfortable staying there.” 

Zuko nodded, unsure if he was more disappointed or relieved that he would not be staying under the same roof as Katara. He wasn’t looking forward to sharing a room with Mai however. They hadn’t shared a bed in well over a year, and he knew it would be uncomfortable for both of them. They had settled into a platonic relationship without really discussing it, appearing together for the sake of maintaining their status as a couple, and spending their free time separately. They still spoke of course, and they cared about each other, but any pretense about their relationship was long gone. They were both fully aware that if they were to marry, it would be for convenience only. 

Pakku led Iroh into Hakoda’s house to drop off his things while Hakoda walked Zuko and Mai to Sokka and Suki’s, which was just a few houses away. He knocked once and opened the door, stepping inside. Almost immediately they were surrounded by a tangle of arms as Sokka, Suki, and Ty Lee descended on him and Mai. Ty Lee and Mai drifted away, with the latter smiling softly as she listened to Ty Lee excitedly speak without breathing, and Suki collected their bags after a tight hug so she could bring them to the room he would be sharing with Mai. 

Sokka gave him a tight squeeze, which Zuko eagerly returned. 

“I’m so glad you’re here! I’m going crazy with all this wedding stuff,” Sokka said. “I’ve been listening to Suki and Ty Lee talking about flowers all day. They keep asking me things that I don’t have an answer for!” 

Zuko laughed. “It will all be over soon.” 

Sokka grinned and clapped Zuko’s back. “In the meantime, maybe Mai can take my place with all the girly stuff.”

“Good luck with that,” Zuko chuckled. 

“Hey,” Sokka said, suddenly dropping his voice. “Have you seen Katara yet?”

“Er, no,” Zuko replied, hesitantly. “Why?” 

“I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Are you still… you know…” 

Zuko glanced around, But Hakoda was chatting with Suki on the other side of the room and Mai was still ignoring everyone but Ty Lee. 

“I mean… yeah, but that doesn’t really matter. I’ve been coping for a while.” 

“You sure? If you’re feeling sad or whatever just send me a signal, and I’ll steal you away or something.”

Zuko laughed. “Thanks Sokka, I’ll remember that.”

They all headed back to Hakoda’s house, eager to have some lunch. Chief Arnook and the guests from the North were due to arrive that evening, and Aang and Toph were supposed to arrive any time, so it would probably be the last chance any of them got to sit down and catch up until the wedding was over. 

Iroh and Pakku were inside when they entered, chatting with Katara and Sokka’s Gran Gran as they set the table, but Katara was nowhere to be seen. Disappointed, Zuko took a seat at the table as everyone settled in around him. 

“Where’s Katara?” Hakoda asked, sitting down next to Zuko. 

“She sent a message that she was going to be staying late at the clinic,” Gran Gran replied. “They have a woman in the final stages of labour and she didn’t want to leave until it was over.”

“How sweet of her,” Iroh said. 

“Katara has always been the caring type,” Hakoda said proudly. 

Zuko smiled affectionately despite himself, but he immediately noticed several pairs of eyes on him. Sokka was giving him a sympathetic look, Iroh and Suki had both raised an eyebrow at him, and Mai fixed her unreadable gaze his way. He dropped his gaze to his plate, feeling a blush creep into his cheeks. 

Luckily Sokka saved him. “Is anyone else super excited to see Toph? It’s almost been two years!” 

“I think Aang has seen her once or twice, but otherwise she’s practically vanished,” Suki said, nodding. 

“I am definitely looking forward to seeing her,” Iroh said. “She writes to me as often as she can, but she hates relying on others to read and write for her. We have a lot of catching up to do.” 

“Have you ever considered how strange it is that a fourteen year old blind Earthbender is one of your closest friends?” Mai asked.

“I think it’s sweet,” Ty Lee said with a giggle. 

“That girl is wise beyond her years,” Iroh chuckled. 

Zuko rolled his eyes at his uncle, feeling the tension lift. He reminded himself to thank Sokka later. 

Aang and Toph arrived shortly after lunch, causing another round of hugs and warm greetings. Toph was practically buried under the bodies of her friends as they greeted her, eager to see their elusive friend. Everyone was in a fantastic mood and excited to see one another, and even Aang got over his ire towards Zuko and greeted him with a warm hug. 

“Sokka, Suki, you know I love you guys,” Toph said once the rounds of hugs were over, “but I can hardly see a _thing_ with all this stupid ice, and my feet are _freezing_. If you ever ask me to come here again, I’m sending you a package full of Badgermole dung as a reply.”

“Let’s get inside, it will be much warmer on your feet,” Iroh said, ushering her forward. 

They all headed back inside, but once they crossed the threshold a bigger problem arose. While the snow outside was thick, Toph could still sense the earth beneath her and see a little bit. But inside the floors were made of ice and covered in thick furs, taking away her vision entirely. But determined as she ever was to be self-sufficient, she had insisted that she would be fine. She had even agreed to wear shoes, since she couldn’t see anyway, and didn’t want to get frostbite. 

Sokka had led her upstairs to drop off her things, leaving her to settle in at her insistence. Not long after Sokka had come back downstairs, Toph headed back down to join them. She seemed to be getting along fine on her own, using the walls and banisters to guide her, but halfway down the stairs she missed a step and stumbled. Zuko, who had been standing closest to the stairs, rushed forward to steady her before she fell, and she had to concede that she needed help after all. 

Toph insisted that she could get around fine, she just needed help with stairs. Unfortunately as all the rooms in Hakoda’s house were on the second floor, new arrangements would have to be made for Toph’s safety and mobility. 

“Sokka and Suki’s house is only one story, so you should be able to get around there fine,” Hakoda said. “We can put you up there, and perhaps Zuko and Mai can stay here instead.”

Zuko nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat as he realized he would be in the room directly beside Katara. He looked to Mai, who looked annoyed. 

“Does that work for you?” he asked her. 

She glanced over at Ty Lee and sighed. “I wanted to spend some time with Ty Lee, but I suppose we can make it work. 

“Why don’t you just bunk with me then?” Ty Lee suggested. “It will be like a slumber party!”

The slightest hint of a blush crept into Mai’s pale cheeks, and she glanced up at Zuko. “Would you mind?”

Zuko shook his head, his trepidation growing. “You see me every day; you and Ty Lee haven’t seen each other since the end of the war. Of course I don’t mind.” 

Mai smiled, and Ty Lee jumped up into the air with a cheer. “It’s settled then!”

Sokka ran upstairs to grab Toph’s things, then he and Zuko walked back to his house to pick up his things and shuffle the rooms around. Once they were alone, Sokka turned to Zuko with a frown. 

“Are you sure about this? We can figure something else out,” he said. 

“I’ll be fine, Sokka. We’ll probably all be so busy, I’ll hardly see her anyway. Besides, we are still friends.”

“I know, I just… I feel bad.”

“You have no reason to. It’s not like you made me fall for your sister,” Zuko laughed. “In fact I’m sure you’d rather nobody ever did.”

Sokka chuckled. “Not that I don’t want her to be happy, it’s just… weird.”

“Fair enough,” Zuko replied with a smirk. 

They entered Sokka’s house and headed to the bedroom that Toph was taking over. Sokka put her stuff on the bed as Zuko collected Mai’s things and moved them across the hall to Ty Lee’s room, then came back and collected his own things. Once done, they headed back out of the house. 

They had just started back when they heard someone shout Zuko’s name, and they turned towards the source. Zuko immediately spotted Katara jogging towards them; she had her hair piled up in a messy knot on top of her head, and her thick jacket was open at the front, flowing behind her like a cape as she jogged to catch up with them. Zuko’s heart skipped a beat, and he froze in his tracks.

“Zuko… what do you want me to do?” Sokka asked quickly. “Should I distract her? Should I leave??”

But Zuko didn’t hear him. He hadn’t seen her in almost a year, and in that time she had matured into her womanly figure. She was taller now, and though her open coat he could see that her body was toned and her curves fuller. 

He stared at her, mouth slightly open. He had spent the last several months convinced that he could keep his feelings for her at bay, that he could be content just being friends. But seeing her after so long, and seeing her looking more attractive than ever… he knew he was in trouble. 

Suddenly he felt a smack on his arm, and he turned his gaze to Sokka with a questioning look.

“Stop gawking and answer me,” Sokka said, looking grossed out.

“Uh… sorry… what?” 

Sokka groaned and rolled his eyes. “Do you want me to stay? Should I distract her? What do you want me to do?”

“Oh. No, I’m fine Sokka, really.”

He didn’t have time to argue as Katara approached, slightly breathless and her cheeks tinged red from the jog across the snow. She hesitated for a moment, and he noticed her eyes sweep over him. 

“Er… hi Katara,” he said awkwardly. 

She grinned at him and moved forward, embracing him. He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly to him. They stayed that way for a long moment, until Sokka cleared his throat loudly. They broke apart and Zuko could see a blush creep across her face. 

“It’s good to see you,” she said. “I hope the trip was okay.”

“It was… loud. It was a very full ship,” he laughed. 

She grinned again, rendering him breathless. Sokka elbowed him in the side. 

“Let’s get back to dad’s house,” he said. 

“I guess I missed dinner, huh?” Katara asked as they began to walk. “And why do you have all of your things?” 

Zuko and Sokka exchanged a look.

“Yeah you missed dinner, but dad saved some leftovers for you,” Sokka began. “And… we uh, are having a bit of a room switch. It turns out that Toph is having a hard time seeing, and it’s safer for her to stay with us so she doesn’t have to use the stairs. So… she and Zuko are switching.”

“Oh… I see,” Katara replied. “I can’t believe we didn’t consider the ice thing before.”

“To be fair, we usually forget that she is blind at all,” Sokka said, looking relieved that Katara seemed unphased by the news. 

“So you and Mai will be next to me then?” Katara asked, her voice tight. 

“Er… Mai is going to stay with Ty Lee actually… they wanted time to catch up. So… it’s just me,” Zuko replied, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“O-okay, yeah that makes sense…” she said. 

Zuko could tell she was nervous. He was too, in all honesty, knowing full well just how much they both struggled to stay away from each other. But the house was going to be full at any given time; what trouble could they get into with so many people around?

They reached Hakoda’s house and headed inside where another round of greetings began. Katara beelined towards Toph, sweeping her into a tight hug. 

“Toph! It’s _so_ good to see you!” she exclaimed. 

“It’s good to see you too, Sugar Queen, but you’re kind of choking me to death,” Toph gasped.

Katara released her with a sheepish laugh. “Sorry.”

“How did the birth go?” Hakoda asked. “Was the baby delivered safely?” 

“Yes! It all went well, and both mom and baby are resting now. It was a little girl,” Katara replied, beaming.

“Wait, you just helped deliver a baby, and then you came here and hugged me??” Toph said, a disgusted look on her face. 

Katara laughed. “I washed up. Though, I really do want to take a bath…” 

Toph scowled. “Warn me next time.” 

“I think it’s great,” Ty Lee said. “It must be so rewarding!” 

“It is, really. I mean, it’s not the only thing I do at the clinic, but it’s my favourite. The staff at the clinic has grown and we have a few traditional healers in addition to the two Waterbenders who moved here from the North and myself, and one of our new staff is a midwife. She has been training me.”

“That’s wonderful, Katara!” Iroh exclaimed. “You will excel at it, I am sure.”

“And it’s a job that you can do anywhere, right?” Aang chimed in. “We could use a healer of your talent at the Southern Air Temple.”

Zuko could see Katara’s mouth twitch as she fought a frown. He didn’t have to ask what was on her mind to know she had no intention of spending her life cooped up at the Air Temple watching Aang fawn over his acolytes while she mended their clothes and healed their cuts and scrapes. He knew she was happy with her life in the South, and only something drastic would take her away. 

“Yeah, maybe,” Katara replied dismissively. “Anyway, I’m going to go take a bath, so I’ll be back in a bit.”

She waved at them all, then turned and headed up the stairs. Zuko stared after her, watching as she stripped of her jacket. Sokka elbowed him again and leaned in close.

“Seriously, stop gawking at my sister!” he hissed in his ear. 

Zuko blushed and tore his eyes away. “Sorry.”

“Why don’t we all head into the sitting room and relax until Chief Arnook arrives?” Hakoda suggested. 

Everyone agreed and they moved towards the sitting room to bunch around the fire. Zuko moved to follow, but stopped when Hakoda gave him a curious look.

“Why don’t you put your things upstairs first?” he suggested, smirking. 

“Oh, right,” Zuko said sheepishly. 

He turned and headed up the stairs, his heart pounding with every step. The last thing he needed was to run into Katara in the hall wrapped in a towel, though he supposed with so many guests in the house she probably wouldn’t be strolling about in a state of undress. He made his way down the hall and entered his room, dropping his things on the bed with a low sigh. 

“Get a grip,” he muttered to himself. 

Zuko closed his eyes and took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm his nerves. He could feel the flames on the torches of his room pulsing as he breathed in and out, and after a few minutes he began feeling more centred and calm. He continued for a few more minutes before finally opening his eyes. He turned around to leave, pulling the door open and stopping short. Aang was standing on the other side.

“Um… hi Aang. What’s up?” he asked, confused. 

“Er, nothing! You were just taking a while so… I uh, thought I’d come see if you were okay,” Aang stuttered.

Zuko knew immediately that he was lying, and assumed that he had noticed Zuko’s absence and wanted to check to make sure he wasn’t with Katara. He frowned at Aang, crossing his arms. 

“I’m fine, I was just getting settled,” he said.

“Good to hear! Uh, let’s go downstairs with the others!” Aang replied, grinning sheepishly. 

Zuko shut his door behind him and gave Aang an annoyed look, but followed him back down the hall to join the others. 

Chief Arnook, his wife, and their entourage arrived late in the evening, and after they had all been settled into their respective accommodations, everyone was quite exhausted. They had spent a little time catching up, but eventually it was mutually agreed that an early night was in order. There would be much to do the next day, and plenty of time to catch up at the reception. 

Zuko headed up to bed, grateful for the chance to get away. His mind was swirling, and he was having a very difficult time keeping his eyes off of Katara. He was pretty sure he would have a bruise from all the times Sokka had to elbow him in the ribs. But he was convinced that after a good sleep, his willpower would be restored. His head hit the pillow and he closed his eyes, allowing his thoughts to wander towards the enchanting Waterbender in the room next to him. Tomorrow he would harden his resolve and just be her friend, but tonight, he allowed himself to dwell.

XXXX

Katara woke early the next day to the bustle of a house full of people. She groaned, pulling her pillow over her head, wanting just five more minutes of blissful sleep. She had gone to bed feeling proud of herself. She was finding it easier and easier to be around Zuko, and while she still had to fight a burning urge to kiss him every time she laid her eyes on him, they seemed to be getting along quite well as just friends. It was a promising start anyway, and definitely preferable to the fighting and awkward tension. 

She threw her blankets off with a sigh, heading towards the bathroom to get ready for the day. She could already hear voices downstairs, and as she left the bathroom to return to her room she ran into Iroh, emerging from his room. He greeted her cheerily, then snuck into the bathroom behind her before anyone else could. She returned to her room and threw on some clothes, then headed downstairs.

Apart from Iroh and Aang, everyone was crowded around the dining table picking at a spread of food. Sokka was over, having been banished from his own home so Suki could start getting ready, and he was chatting to Zuko off to one side of the room. She greeted her father with a kiss on the cheek, then helped herself to some breakfast. But she didn’t stick around; she was expected at Sokka and Suki’s, and she didn’t want to be late. So she said a quick goodbye and headed over.

When she arrived she saw that they were all up as well, and already hard at work. Ty Lee was helping Suki style her hair, while Mai, much to Katara’s surprise, sat before the bride applying makeup to her face. Toph on the other hand, was sitting on the couch munching on her breakfast. 

“Toph, are you just going to sit there all day?” Katara chastised. 

“Hey, I can’t see _anything_. My job is to stay out of the way and provide colourful commentary,” Toph replied. 

Katara rolled her eyes and turned to Suki. “What do you need me to do?” 

“I’d love a glass of wine,” she laughed. 

Katara grinned. “I can definitely provide that.”

She crossed to the kitchen and pulled out a bottle and five glasses, pouring wine in each before distributing them to her friends. 

“To Suki,” she said, raising her glass.

“And her having to put up with Sokka for the rest of her life,” Toph added. “Good luck.”

Suki laughed. “Thanks guys.”

It took them a couple of hours to get Suki ready, and it was already lunchtime before they were done. Once Katara had helped her into her dress, she gave her a quick hug and dashed back to her house to get herself ready. Her house was in total chaos. The ceremony was only two hours away, and everyone was rushing to have lunch and get dressed before they had to go to the community hall where the ceremony and reception were taking place. Katara said a quick hello as she came through the door, then ran up the stairs to change. 

While Suki had chosen a beautiful Earth Kingdom style gown, Katara had decided to stick with something warmer and opted for a Water Tribe style. Her dress had a white underlayer, with a dark blue coat over top that cinched at the waist with a thick, white belt and fell open at the hip, revealing the dress underneath. The coat had long sleeves and was fur trimmed along the collar and the hems, crossing over her chest in a similar way to her usual tunics. Once she was dressed she crossed to her mirror, dabbing on a little makeup before styling her hair. She pulled the top layer back and tied it into a tidy knot behind her head, leaving two beaded strands loose around her face. _Hair loopies_ , Sokka had once called them. The rest of her hair she let fall down her back in loose curls. 

Something gleamed in her periphery and she turned, seeing the gold, crescent moon hairpin that Zuko had given her for her birthday last year. She hesitated a moment, then reached out and picked it up, sliding it into her hair. 

By the time she was dressed and satisfied with her appearance, it was almost time to leave for the community building. She took one last look over herself and headed downstairs to meet up with the others. As she came down the stairs she saw that nearly everyone had already assembled and were standing about waiting for the stragglers. Her eyes fell on Zuko, whose heated gaze was fixed on her. His eyes flicked up towards the pin in her hair, and he smiled softly at her, causing her heart to skip a beat. He moved to meet her at the bottom of the stairs, looking regal in his red, black, and gold robes. 

“You look beautiful,” he said. 

“Thank you,” she replied, smiling gratefully. “Do you like the hairpin?” she added playfully.

He grinned and leaned in close. “I’m glad you’re wearing it,” he said, low enough for only her to hear. 

Before she could reply her father’s voice raised above the chatter, ushering them all out of the house. Aang bounded forward out of nowhere, pushing in front of Zuko to take Katara’s arm. She did so with a frown, and gave Zuko a regretful look before letting Aang lead her out into the snow. 

“Isn’t this exciting?” Aang said. “It’s really starting to feel like the war is really over, you know?” 

“Yeah, it’s nice to see everyone finally able to move forward,” Katara replied.

“Speaking of which, I know I’ve been gone a lot over the last few months. Well, since you came to live here really, but especially since I started teaching the Air Acolytes…” Aang began awkwardly. “I feel bad that we have hardly spent any time together, and I know you’re usually so busy here that even when I am around we hardly see each other.” 

Katara felt her stomach drop with guilt. She had been perfectly content hardly ever seeing him, and she had to admit that she had purposefully sought to be busy when he was around. He kept dropping hints that he wanted her to travel with him again, and she wasn’t sure she could handle it. 

“Anyway what I guess I’m saying is that I was hoping that maybe you could come stay with me at the Southern Air Temple. Not all the time, I know you like being here, but maybe just for a couple of weeks here and there?” 

“Er… I… I will think about it, okay? Only, I’ve been training with the midwife and everything, and I don’t want to leave while she still has things to teach me. But I will think about it,” Katara replied. 

Aang seemed satisfied with this answer, and he grinned. “Great! I know the Acolytes would love to meet you finally, I’ve told them so much about you!” 

“That’s great Aang, I’m sure they’re all lovely,” she said, casting a glance to Zuko. 

They arrived at the hall, where most of the guests had already arrived. They didn’t have time to mingle though, for as soon as they had entered the building, they were ushered about to either join the party at the front, or take their seats. Katara and Ty Lee had been asked to stand up with Suki, and Sokka had chosen Aang and Zuko, so the four of them made their way to the front. Suki had asked Toph and Mai if they wanted to be a part of it as well, but Toph said she would rather jump into the ocean, and Mai had given a flat no. So they took their seats among the crowd. 

The ceremony was short and sweet, and had blended both Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom traditions. Suki looked radiant in green and yellow, and Sokka beamed at her through the whole ceremony, almost forgetting his vows, which caused a ripple of laughter among the guests. Once it was all over, they moved into the ballroom where banquet tables had been laid out with food and a band was already playing lively dance music. 

Aang pulled Katara away for a dance, which she obligingly agreed to, and everyone else disappeared to fill their empty stomachs. As he twirled her around the dance floor, she could see a gaggle of young girls huddled off to one side, watching her enviously. This happened everywhere they went, and while it didn’t bother her that they were making eyes at Aang, it did bother her how rude these girls often were to her. To make matters worse, Aang never seemed to notice, and would just laugh it off as a joke if she mentioned it. She often wished he would just break up with her and go pursue one of his worshipers instead. She wasn’t bothered that her boyfriend was flirting with other girls, she was bothered by the fact that her friend often left her abandoned somewhere so he could bask in the attention. It was a large part of the reason she hated travelling with him after the war. 

Even now she caught Aang flashing his toothy grin at the girls, looking smug as they giggled shyly. He had been the one to insist they dance, and he had been lamenting how little time they spent together, but even still his focus was on the first person who stroked his ego instead. 

Once the dance ended, Katara broke away from him before he could insist on another, claiming that she was starving. In truth she was; she had eaten very little all day. But mostly she just wanted to get away. He seemed content with her excuse however, and bounded away to go entertain his admirers. 

Katara looked around for her friends; Toph and Iroh sat at a small table, chatting animatedly as they ate from their massive plates of food. Ty Lee and Mai were huddled together in a corner, Ty Lee chattering non-stop and Mai looking happier than Katara had ever seen her, and Suki and Sokka were at the far end of the room surrounded by well-wishers. She didn’t see Zuko anywhere, and assumed he was probably similarly surrounded by fawning girls, a thought that brought a pang of jealousy to her heart. With a sigh, she headed over to the buffet and grabbed a plate, picking out a few of her favourite foods. As she made her way down the table, the hair on the back of her neck suddenly stood on end, and she felt a warm presence envelop her, overwhelming her with the scent of spice and burning parchment. 

Zuko placed his hand on her lower back, leaning past her to grab a glass of wine off of the table before her. Her breath caught in her throat at his electric touch, and she let it out shakily. 

“Having fun?” he asked, his voice low and alluring.

“I am now,” she breathed, turning her head slightly to cast him a cheeky smirk. 

“Care to join me?”

Katara nodded, reaching out to grab a glass of wine for herself, then followed Zuko as he disappeared back into the crowd. 

“I found a spot away from most of the crowd,” he said, leading her towards a bench at the back of the room. 

“I was wondering where you had gone.”

He smirked. “Believe it or not, I don’t like making small talk with people I barely know.”

“No way, _you_? I never would have guessed,” Katara joked. 

“I know, I hide it so well.” 

They reached his little corner and sat on the cushioned bench. She could feel heat radiating off of him, and it was taking all her strength not to crawl right into his lap. She took a long sip of her wine, then busied herself with picking at her plate of food. 

“I see Aang is keeping occupied,” Zuko said, staring across the ballroom to where he was entertaining the girls with Airbending tricks. 

“Yeah, this happens everywhere.”

“Does it bother you?” 

Katara shrugged. “I suppose it should. I suppose I’m more bothered by the fact that he would drag me along to parties only to ignore me all night.”

“But it doesn’t bother you that he’s flirting with other girls?” 

Katara gave him a sidelong glance. She knew he was fishing for her to confess that she wasn’t in love with Aang, but she wasn’t going to give in so easily.

“Does it bother you when Mai flirts with Ty Lee?” she asked, nodding towards the two girls.

Zuko followed her gaze and watched them for a moment before turning back to Katara. “Not in the slightest.” 

She smirked then set her plate aside, taking another long sip of her wine. She could feel him watching her, and made her heart pound. The band switched to a slower, dreamy tune, and Zuko downed his glass, setting it aside before standing and reaching out his hand to her. 

“Care to dance?” he asked. 

She looked up at him, heart racing. It was only a dance… friends could dance, right? She drank the last of her wine in one nervous gulp, then nodded, taking his hand. He pulled her up, holding onto her hand tightly as he led her to the dancefloor. 

The floor was already crowded with couples, allowing them to blend in without much notice. Zuko pulled her close, one hand clasped in hers, and the other resting gently on her waist. She lifted her free hand to his shoulder, her body on fire and longing to close the minimal space between them. He fixed his golden eyes on hers as he began to lead her along to the music, surprising her with his grace.

“You’re an excellent dancer,” she breathed, transfixed. 

He smirked. “Thank you. It helps when you have an excellent partner.” 

She blushed, but was unable to tear her eyes from his. She felt like she was in a dream, and she never wanted it to end. He smiled softly at her, gently pulling her closer. 

“H-how long are you staying in the South?” she asked, trying to distract her thoughts from how close his lips were to hers. 

“I have to leave the day after tomorrow. Duty calls, and all that.”

“It must be exhausting.”

“It is, but I’m getting better at managing my time. My Council has been very supportive, as have the Fire Sages, and the people seem to trust me well enough. I’ve earned a few breaks,” he said with a grin. 

“You’d think helping put an end to the war would be enough to warrant as many breaks as you like,” she laughed. 

“You’d think,” he agreed. 

The song came to an end and for a moment they merely stood in each other’s embrace, unable to tear their eyes from each other. But then another lively song began, and the shift in melody brought them back to reality. They pulled apart, drifting back towards Zuko’s corner, stopping to grab another glass of wine each.

“So you’re training to be a midwife?” Zuko asked as they returned to the bench. 

“I am. I have delivered babies before, but she has been teaching me so many things I never knew.”

“Is that what you want to do then?” 

“I’m not sure. I do enjoy it, and I also love working at the clinic. But I also love training the new Waterbenders, and combat, and even politics.”

“Politics?” he said, raising an eyebrow. “That makes one of us.”

Katara laughed. “My father has asked me to sit in on meetings and such occasionally. He says both Sokka and I are natural leaders; he has a tactical mind and is great with logic and reasoning, whereas I have compassion and empathy, which allows me to feel people out and get them to sympathize with whatever cause I am fighting for. I’ve found I do enjoy it.”

“Would you like to be a leader some day?” he asked, a hopeful gleam in his eyes. 

“Maybe. Sokka is pretty much set to be the next leader of the Southern Water Tribe, and I wouldn’t want to try and take that from him. I think he will be good at it.”

“I agree.”

“But maybe I could be an ambassador or something,” she shrugged. “I don’t know. I still have plenty of time to figure it out I suppose. For now, I’m content just exploring my options.”

“If you became an ambassador for the Southern Water Tribe, we would probably see a lot more of each other,” Zuko said, smiling. 

Katara blushed, both thrilled and terrified by the idea. She took a long drink of her wine, unsure how to reply. She could feel the wine going to her head; she had already had a few glasses earlier in the day with Suki, and she was almost done her second of the evening, so she could feel her body tingling as the alcohol settled in. She set her glass aside. Zuko watched her with an amused look, sipping slowly at his own drink. 

“Had enough?” he asked.

Katara laughed. “I’m definitely getting tipsy. If I don’t stop now, you’ll have to carry me home.” 

Zuko smirked mischievously, but let the comment pass. “I should probably slow down myself… the wine has been flowing quite freely today.”

“Yeah, I’m surprised Ty Lee is even standing. She drank half the bottle before lunch.”

“I don’t think there is much of a difference between sober Ty Lee and drunk Ty Lee, to be honest,” he laughed. 

“I would ask you if it’s been nice to see her again, but it looks like Mai has been hogging her attention,” Katara said, watching the two girls as they ignored the rest of the crowd. 

“They’ve missed each other, so I can’t blame her.”

“I really wish we could have more events like this,” Katara mused. “It’s nice to have everyone back together.”

“It really makes you miss those days on Ember Island, huh?” Zuko said softly. 

Katara turned back to him with a warm smile. “Yeah. I miss those days more than anything.”

Zuko smirked and looked down at his hands thoughtfully. She watched him weave his fingers together nervously, and felt the urge to take his hands in hers. The wine was lowering her resolve, and she needed it more than ever.

“Do you want to go for a walk?” she asked suddenly. “I think I need some fresh air.”

He looked back to her and nodded. “Yeah, me too.”

They got up and crossed the room, heading towards the doors. Katara cast a wary eye towards Aang, but he was so busy with his group of admirers he probably wouldn’t know she was gone at all. They wove through the crowd and out into the chilly evening snow, walking away from the hall. It seemed that most of the city was either at the party or cooped up at home, leaving them blissfully alone. The air was quiet around them, the lights from nearby homes casting a warm glow as snowflakes softly fell, catching in their hair. 

There was a silent stillness to the air, as if the chill had frozen time itself, and in the silence all they could hear was the crunching of their feet and the soft sound of snowflakes hitting the ground. They walked for a while in silence, wandering aimlessly and enjoying the beauty of the quiet evening. Katara was glad to be away from the crowd, and she knew Zuko would be too. He was always happiest when he was in small groups of familiar people.

“It’s so beautiful here,” Zuko said suddenly, his voice low. “I don’t think I’ve ever really appreciated it before.”

“It’s too bad it’s cloudy. Normally you can see the stars go on forever.”

“I like the snow. There’s something… otherworldly about it, you know? Even on the darkest night, it glitters and casts this… glow over everything.”

Katara smiled, looking around at the snowy ground with new appreciation. 

“And it’s so still,” he continued thoughtfully. “It’s so silent I can hear my heart beating. I feel so… calm.” 

“I imagine you don’t get a lot of stillness back home, do you?” 

“Not really. Even when I do find a few moments to just be alone, it’s not long before someone bothers me with a question or a report or something. It’s settling down, now that it has almost been two years since the end of the war. Well, it’s less chaotic anyway. But it can be a bit much.”

“Do you want me to leave you alone now? I’m sure you must miss solitude.”

“No,” Zuko replied, smiling at her. “I only ever feel like myself when I’m around you.”

She blushed and turned away to hide it. It was growing cold, and even with the fur lining of her dress she felt a shiver. 

“I should have brought a jacket,” she said, rubbing her arms. 

“Me too. I’m freezing,” Zuko laughed. 

“Do you want to go back?”

“No, not really. I’ve had enough of the crowd for one day.”

“Me too,” Katara replied. She hesitated for a moment, then added, “Do you want to go back to the house? I doubt anyone else will be back for hours.”

“Yeah, that would be nice.” 

They made their way towards Hakoda’s house, falling into a comfortable silence once more. The house wasn’t far, and when they approached it was dark. They entered, happy to see that it was completely empty. The fire was burning low, but with a quick gesture Zuko had it roaring again. They crossed the room and sat down on a couch together, rubbing the cold out of their stiff limbs. 

Once she had warmed up a little, Katara reached up and pulled the crescent moon pin from her hair, placing it gently on the table. Then she pulled her hair loose, letting it fall around her shoulders with a sigh. 

“Good idea,” Zuko said, pulling his crown out of his top knot and placing it next to her hairpin. 

He shook his hair loose, letting it fall down his shoulders. The long hair suited him, and she found herself longing to reach out and run her fingers through it. Zuko looked up, catching her admiring him, and he smirked. 

“What?” he asked. 

“N-nothing!” Katara stammered, blushing. “I was just thinking that I like your hair long.”

He grinned, sitting back against the cushions. 

“What are you grinning about?” she demanded.

“You’re cute when you’re flustered. You always have been.”

She felt her blush deepen, and her heart threatened to pound out of her chest. He hadn’t been this bold with her in a while, and she wasn’t sure if it was the wine, or if he had just given up on trying to just be friends. 

“Katara, why are you still with Aang? It’s obvious to everyone that you aren’t happy with him,” he asked suddenly, his smile faltering. 

She was caught off guard, and gaped at him for a moment while she scrambled for a reply. 

“I… we… haven’t really had a _chance_ to be happy. He’s away so much,” she said.

“And the fact that you avoid him when he is around has nothing to do with that?” 

“I… I don’t avoid him,” she lied. 

“This isn’t fair to Aang, you know. And it’s certainly not fair to you to force yourself to stay with someone you don’t want to be with.”

“Well why are you still with Mai?” she retorted. 

“Because it’s convenient for both of us. We get along well, and we have known each other forever. If I can’t be with who I _truly_ want to be with, at least I have a friend by my side.” 

“Zuko… please don’t start this,” she begged. 

“Why? Because this isn’t fair to me either, you know. You keep holding me at arm’s length, telling me you just want to be friends, then you flirt with me all evening and stare at me like you’re trying not to devour me, and it makes this _impossible_.”

Katara buried her face in her hands, letting out a frustrated sigh. “We have already been over this… we made our choices already, we can’t go back on them now.” 

“Why, Katara?” he yelled, getting to his feet. “Why not? You are miserable with Aang, and I’m only with Mai so I don’t get auctioned off to whichever noble family has a daughter my Council likes. All you have to do is _decide_ to fight for us!” 

“It’s not that easy! What would your Council say if you told them you want to be with a Waterbender from the South? What would your people say? Where could our relationship possibly go?” she hissed, getting to her feet as well.

“I don’t know, Katara, but I’m willing to fight for us. I always have been!” 

“I don’t want you to _fight_ for anything! Especially not when this can only lead in disaster and heartbreak!” 

“Why do you always assume it will? What are you so afraid of?” 

Her anger was bubbling up to a breaking point, and the wine certainly didn’t help her keep her grasp on everything she had been holding back. 

“What am I afraid of? Do you have any idea how much it hurt me when you chose Mai? My heart was _shattered_! I spent all of last year just trying to hold together what little of myself I had left to hang on to. So yes, I am afraid. I am afraid that I will lose you _again_ , because I don’t think I will survive it!”

Zuko’s face softened, and he let out a long sigh. “I’m sorry Katara.” 

She dropped back onto the couch heavily, crossing her arms over herself. “I’m as much to blame… I shouldn’t have avoided you after the fight with Azula.”

“Is that why you stay with Aang? Because it’s… easy?”

“None of this is easy,” she breathed.

“But he won’t break your heart.” 

Katara gave him a despairing look. “Zuko… I can’t keep having this fight with you. We just keep going in circles, and it’s exhausting.”

“Fine. You win. If you just want to be friends, then that is all we'll ever be, and we can continue to live our miserable lives never feeling truly whole or happy because we are willingly letting the one person in the world who completes us pass us by.”

She sighed, exasperated. “I… think I’m just going to go to bed.”

“Fine.”

She stood, and immediately felt her head swim. She wasn’t sure if it was the wine or her swirling emotions, but she wavered slightly and reached out for something to hold on to. Zuko instinctively reached out to steady her, grabbing her arm. She looked up at him and could see the pain behind his golden eyes. How she wished she could take away both of their pain. 

For a moment they merely stared at each other, then almost automatically Katara moved towards him, resting her hands on his chest. Zuko’s arms snaked around her waist and he pulled her close. His warmth was overwhelming, as was the magnetic pull that connected them. She couldn’t help herself; she had lost all control. 

They came together, mouths finding one another hungrily. Katara moved her hands up his chest and into his hair, running her fingers through it like she had longed to do all day. One of his hands came up to the back of her head, clasping her hair desperately as he pulled her body against his with the other. His hand moved down to her thigh and he pulled her leg forward, moving his hips against hers. She let out a small gasp; she could feel how badly he wanted her, and her own body grew hot with need. Zuko kissed his way down her neck, gently sucking on the tender skin as the hand on her thigh worked its way down, trying to separate the layers of her dress from her body underneath. She pulled his head back and moved in, nipping at his earlobe with her teeth. 

“Let’s go upstairs,” she growled. 

He didn’t need to be told twice. He pulled her towards the staircase, stumbling as he captured her lips once again. His hands deftly pulled at the belt around her waist, unwinding it. He held it loosely, letting it trail behind them as they made their way up the stairs. Katara pulled up his tunic, wanting to feel his bare skin. She let her fingers explore, gliding their way over his toned chest, then back down his sides, making him inhale sharply. They reached the top of the stairs and stumbled down the hall, their limbs tangled as they frantically pulled at each other’s clothing. 

They reached Katara’s room and she reached behind her to turn the knob. They fell through the doorway, and she peeled herself away from him just long enough to slam it shut and lock it behind her. As she turned around to face him he was upon her again, cupping her face in his hands and kissing her passionately. Her arms came up to meet him, and she ran her hands up his chest and unclasped his cloak, letting it fall heavily to the floor with a thud. Her hands found their way under his tunic once more, lightly dragging her fingernails across his skin. He let out a low growl, releasing her long enough to pull his tunic off and toss it aside. She untied her coat, and once it was loose Zuko reached up and pushed it off of her shoulders before pinning her against the door. 

As Katara pulled her coat off and let it fall, Zuko grasped her thigh again and pulled her leg to hook around his hip, holding it in place as he moved against her. He pulled the top of her underdress open, kissing his way across her collarbone. Her trembling hands worked at the ties that held her dress closed, breathing heavily with hot desire. His free hand pulled up her skirt and found its way underneath; he ran his hand across her hip, finding his way between her legs. She let out a soft moan as he teased her with his fingers, desperately working at the knots that held her dress closed. 

Growing impatient, Zuko removed his hands from under her skirt and reached up, ripping the ties apart. He pulled away, watching her hungrily as she slipped out of her dress. Once it hit the floor he pulled her towards him, kissing her neck while she pulled at the ties holding up his pants. Once they were on the floor, he pulled her towards the bed and lowered her onto it, slowly pulling off her underclothes as he left trails of kisses over her bare flesh. Each touch was electric, and her body craved his. She breathed his name, begging him for more. He removed the rest of their underclothes hurriedly, his own desire driven wild by her passionate plea, then pulled her legs to straddle his hips. 

He hesitated for a moment, his eyes burning for her. She looked up at him, realizing he was giving her a chance to stop before they went too far. But all she could focus on was the irresistible pull between them, and how badly she wanted to give herself over to it. Judging by the look in his eyes, he felt the same. She rested her hands on his arms and nodded, hardly able to catch her breath. He moved into her with a moan, squeezing his eyes shut as he finally gave himself over to the tension that had been building between them since that hot summer night they had first kissed, almost two years ago. 

His hands found their way into his hair and he grasped her thick locks tightly, as if afraid to let her go. Katara hooked her legs around his, moving her hips in time with his. He Leaned forward and captured her lips in a sloppy kiss, breathing hard as they succumbed to one another. Katara had been longing for this with every fiber of her being, and it was even better than she could have imagined. Every nerve was on fire, and she writhed underneath him, moaning his name against his lips. 

He kissed her harder, grazing her lip with his teeth. She brought her hands up and clawed at his back in response, causing him to moan loudly. He unclasped her hair and grabbed her arms, pulling her to sit up, straddling his lap. She hooked her arms around his neck and threw her head back with a breathy sigh as he left a trail of gentle bites across her neck, his hands gripping her thighs as they moved as one. Her fingers found his hair and she grasped it tight, his fingers digging into her skin. She could feel her body tensing, her pleasure building. She moaned again, quickening her pace with ardent desperation. 

Zuko inhaled a sharp breath and he buried his face in the crook of her neck, letting out a low moan as his body began to tremble, reaching his peak. Her eyes squeezed shut and her breath caught in her throat. She released it with a moan as waves of hot pleasure coursed through her like fire. After a moment she collapsed into him, and he held her tight as he struggled to catch his breath. 

They fell back onto the mattress, a tangled mess of limbs, panting heavily. Zuko recovered first, and he reached down to pull the thick fur blanket over their trembling bodies. Katara knew she should feel guilty. She knew she should regret what had just happened. But the only thing she could focus on was the blissful satisfaction that coursed through her. She snuggled up to Zuko, feeling his strong arms wrap around her. He kissed her forehead and she looked up at him. He smiled weakly at her, then kissed her lips tenderly. He kissed her again and again, and she savoured each kiss. 

Finally their passion gave way to exhaustion, and Zuko extinguished the torches in her room with a lazy flick of his wrist before burying his face in her hair. Katara nestled her way under his chin and held him tight, feeling truly happy for the first time in years. She drifted off into peaceful slumber, allowing herself one night of perfect bliss before the world came crashing down upon them.

XXXX

Katara woke the next morning sore, but extremely well rested. She could feel bruises forming where Zuko had bit at her skin, and the memory of the previous night flooded back. It had been a perfect night that she would never forget, but she knew it couldn’t happen again. She had finally given in to her desire and now she had finally gotten closure, she could move on. Or at least that is what she tried to tell herself. In truth, now that she knew what she was missing, she craved him even more. 

Zuko stirred, letting out a soft groan of protest as consciousness pulled him from his slumber. Katara smiled, and despite herself, she kissed him. His eyes opened and he smiled against her lips, pulling her close. He deepened the kiss, letting his hands explore her exposed skin, sending shivers through her. He rolled her onto her back and she ran her inner thigh against his leg invitingly, already burning with desire. But as his hand made its way down her stomach and between her legs, she suddenly grasped his wrist, stopping him. He pulled back and gave her a quizzical look. 

“We can’t… someone will hear,” she said.

“I’ll keep you quiet,” he replied with a cheeky smirk. 

She flushed and bit her lip, using every bit of her willpower to resist him. “Zuko… we can’t. This can’t happen again.”

His smile faltered and he closed his eyes with a deflated sigh. He fell to the mattress next to her, but left his arm draped over her waist. “We’ve already crossed a line we can’t uncross, Katara.”

“I know. But this _has_ to be the end.”

He opened his eyes and looked at her, and she could see the heartache behind them. His fingers traced gentle circles across her waist. “I love you, always and forever.”

“Please don’t make this worse, Zuko. It’s hard enough,” she said mournfully. 

He reached up and brushed a strand of hair off of her face, his eyes fixed on her as if he were trying to memorize every detail of her features. She had no idea what was going on in his head, and it was driving her crazy. 

“Zuko…”

“I should get out of here before somebody comes looking for us,” he interrupted, pulling away from her. 

He sat up and crawled out of the bed, gathering his clothing and dressing. Katara clutched the blanket to herself for a moment, watching him and wondering if he had finally given up on them. She tossed her blanket aside and found her robe, slipping it on before gathering her discarded clothing from the floor. She tossed it onto her bed, waiting for Zuko to finish dressing. 

Once he was ready, Zuko strode over to her and swiftly pulled her in, capturing her lips in a passionate kiss that made her knees go weak. When he pulled away, he locked his eyes on hers. “I will never stop waiting for you, Katara,” he said.

She felt her resolve slipping, and she wrapped her arms around herself protectively. “I’ll check to see if the coast is clear,” she said, her voice shaking. 

She crossed the room and unlocked the door, opening it just enough to peek out into the hall. The house was silent, so she opened it a little further and leaned into the hallway. It was dark and empty. She pulled back and waved him forward. He moved to the door, reaching up one last time to let his fingers rest at the corner of her mouth for just a moment, fixing her with an intense stare that made her swallow hard, then he slipped into the hall and into his own room. 

Katara sighed and returned to her room, closing the door behind her. Slowly she got dressed and brushed out her hair, leaving it down to cover the bite marks that her clothing couldn’t hide. Her mind was swimming with the memory of the previous night, and she practically ached to have his hands on her again. What was she so afraid of? She had woken up feeling so complete, so blissfully happy, so wasn’t that worth the risk? But then she remembered the horrible pain in her chest the moment she saw Zuko and Mai kissing before his coronation. That soul crushing agony that made her feel like she was dying. How could she survive that again? She wished she could just make a choice and stick to it. 

Eventually she heard voices drifting up from downstairs, so she left her room and went down for breakfast. She was the last one down, and as she entered the dining room her eyes lingered on Zuko habitually. He was staring back at her, his eyes burning with a longing that made her blush. She swiftly took her seat at the table, jumping as Aang leaned over and kissed her cheek. 

“Good morning!” he exclaimed before returning to his breakfast. 

“G-good morning…” she muttered, dropping her eyes to her plate. 

She was overwhelmed with sudden, sickening guilt. She knew Aang would be crushed if he found out what had happened between her and Zuko, and despite the fact that she didn’t want to be with him, she didn’t want to hurt him like that either. But how could she keep a secret like that? How could she live with herself?

She glanced back up at Zuko, who was watching her carefully with an unreadable expression. She was desperate to know what he was thinking, and if he felt as terrible as she did. But she never got the chance to ask.

All day she tried to catch him alone. She wanted to ask him if he was going to tell Mai what had happened, and if she should tell Aang. She wanted to tell him how sorry she was that she continued to push him away. Most of all, she wanted to tell him that she loved him too, desperately and completely. But the house was in chaos. In addition to the guests staying there, people had been coming in and out all day, either visiting friends, dropping off gifts for Suki and Sokka, or bringing reports to Hakoda.

It didn’t help that Aang had gotten it into his head that he needed to spend the day with her. As expected, he hadn’t even noticed that she had left the party until it was over and he had started home. Assuming she was asleep, he had gone up to bed to sleep off the wine that he had overindulged on. And was now determined to make it up to her. She wanted nothing more than for him to leave her alone. Every time he was near, Katara was wracked with a fresh wave of guilt. 

That night she crept out of her room and knocked gently on Zuko’s door, but it went unanswered. She knew he heard her; he had always been a light sleeper. He was choosing to ignore her, and it hurt. She supposed it was justified, after all she had done it to him often enough. 

By the time Zuko and his party left the next day, she had made up her mind. She would put their night together behind her. She would forget it, and put her love for Zuko and her guilt around Aang aside, shoving it down deep where she had buried her feelings before. She was left feeling numb, and that would have to be good enough.


End file.
